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Wednesday, October 18, 2017

Fasting Euphoria

Another incredibly busy day!

I am having one of those “euphoric” moments I mentioned yesterday.  I just feel so much better.  Still need my pain med, but it is actually working when I take it instead of just dulling the pain a little.  Not that I don’t have any pain, but the difference in the way I felt 4-5 weeks ago is great.  I did not take the Celebrex last night.  I will take it only on days that I am eating.

The scale was encouraging this morning.  Tomorrow is weigh-in, but this morning I was showing a nice loss.  I feel strongly I am on the right track.  I am retaining a little water this evening; hope that doesn't hang around until tomorrow.

I spent the morning and part of the afternoon with my boss at a co-counsel’s office (like I did last week).  I don’t know why that feels so taxing.  I guess using different equipment (my laptop, but doing work tasks, which have to be done very quickly).  We stayed after the meeting to get a few things done.  When my boss is in this mode, he moves quickly from task to task (even though my computer is slow because of the internet connection and other issues) and I am not functioning at the same level I am at the office, so it feels a little stressful.  I keep having to tell him to wait.  He gets very focused on these occasions.

I did some more cooking last night – another veggie for my meals I did not get done Sunday (some roasted Brussels sprouts with bacon).  It smelled wonderful, but there was no temptation to partake.  It is enough to know I can have it in a couple of days.  I have 7 or 8 full meals in the refrigerator and freezer right now.  Of course, I will not eat all of them this weekend, and I plan to cook another couple of meals, so there will be more added to what I have.  I don’t want to get tired of eating the same thing all the time.  I haven’t decided what I am going to cook yet.  I do plan to boil some eggs tonight so tomorrow night, if I have time, I can mix up the deviled eggs and put them together.  That way I will have them available on the days I am eating.  I do not need to make a full recipe, though, unless my daughter wants some.  They would not keep and there are only so many I will want in one weekend.  They are a great thing to have when you are eating low-carb.

I am trying to get a little done every day on packing.  I was about ready to leave for work this morning when I decided I would take a few minutes and pack a couple of boxes.  I have to keep moving on this or I will not be ready when the time comes.

Evening

I worked until almost 8:00 tonight.  I'm glad because after working on my budget the last couple of days, I want to make sure I have enough to borrow as little as possible for the renovation we want to do, and in the coming months, pay off existing debt as quickly as possible.   The more I work now, the less I have to work in the months to come.  With OT at a medium level (for me), I can get everything paid off by the middle of July.  I really want to do that, so I am willing to put in the hours right now.

That being said, there is not a lot of "me time" right now.  Between working, and packing, etc. at home, there is not that much down time.  I am not sure I am doing enough on the home front.  But I have definitely upped my activity level.  And there is only so much energy I have when I work 11 hours in a day.  I need to make sure to get up at 6:00 and get more done then; that is when I have more energy.

I am feeling positive and optimistic.  I am doing what I need to do to be healthier and I like that feeling.

That's it for today.  39 days down, 461 to go!

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Gut Problems and Fasting

Day 2 of this week’s IF.  I have noticed something.  When a hunger pang hits, if I am not thinking about it, my first reaction (of course) is to want food.  But if I give it some thought, I know that (duh!) hunger is expected and therefore feels like no big deal.  Sometimes hunger actually feels good to me.  I have gotten much more comfortable with being a little hungry than being way too full.  That makes me miserable these days.  But sometimes the sensations you have with fasting can be almost euphoric.  Sometimes I feel really good – great mood, feel better physically, healthy, etc.

Today is a little slower at work – I actually have a little time to think – because my boss is in mediation.  That will not last.  I also have a lot of things to catch up on, so am trying to do that today.  But it is nice not to be so push-push for a change.

I had my regular appointment with my pain management doctor yesterday.  I asked him if he could put me on Celebrex (an anti-inflammatory that worked well for me years ago).  He did.  I picked it up last night and they warned me to always take it with food, so guess I’d better take it only on my eating days.  But I did take one last night (I figured one time wouldn’t do too much damage).  I fancy I already feel a little better in my tailbone and my heel.  I am supposed to take one capsule at bedtime, so will have to take it only on Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays.  Hopefully that is enough to do me some good.  It is not something I have to take every day for it to work.  I don’t want to stay on an anti-inflammatory indefinitely, but if it will get these two things settled down, that would be awesome.  Sometimes I put off going to bed because of the tailbone pain.  It is really hard to get comfortable many nights.  In the morning I wake up with this weird kink in my back (which goes away after I get moving), but I think it comes from how I am sleeping with the coccyx pillow and other pillows I use to kind of even up the surface I am sleeping on.  I would rather not have to do that, but right now it is necessary because of the tailbone issue.  I hope this will clear it up and I can dispense with that.

I am more hopeful about pain issues clearing up and getting weight off than I have been for a long time.  I think IF is the best thing I can do.

Evening

I was driving home from work and thought, I just have to get through today and I only have a day and a half left.  Actually I am not sitting around wishing I could eat, most of the time.  Every once in a while, but I usually don't think about it.  But it is nice when I get to.

I am ready to get weight loss well on the road.  In particular, I am ready to lose my belly.  I think it is a big part of back pain because it pulls the back into an exaggerated arch.  The more I can lose of my belly, the better.  Of course, I need to lose all over, but that is the biggest thing that affects me other than just being too heavy and that being hard on my joints.  I do believe I am on the right track to get this done.  If I think about doing this weeks on end, it doesn't sound very likely, but if I take it a day at a time, it really is not hard at all.

IF definitely will save me some money.  That is not my motive, but I will enjoy that fruit of what I am doing.  I have been working on my budget lately, trying to figure out how much money I will need for closing, how much for Phase 1 renovation, etc.  I need to know how borrowing certain amounts of money will affect me on an ongoing basis.  I can handle it, but I do hope my current OT continues until I have my other debts paid off.  That should take until the middle of next year.
 
I was reading a blog post the other day by the Wheat Belly author and he was talking about gut problems and how they can inhibit weight loss and cause any number of problems.  I was thinking, oh no, I probably have this problem because I have had a really hard time losing weight in the last two or three years.  I decided to try to find information tonight on how to heal these gut problems.  Here is one quote I came across:
 
Fasting 
  • There is truly no faster way to downregulate inflammation and jumpstart healing than fasting. Fasting works wonders for many health conditions, but is especially restorative for a leaky gut because it provides a break from digesting food, allowing time to “heal and seal” the lining. I’ve observed fasts heal serious gut conditions time and time again. It’s an ancient tool that is underused for healing modern disease.

 
I read somewhere else that the wrong kind of gut bacteria is often consumed during longer fasts.  Considering I have done 3 fasts in the last 13-14 months, the shortest being 24 days (before starting IF), I think I had to have done some good in this area.  Now I did not eat like I should all the time after these fasts, so that could have caused me to backtrack a bit after each one, but I know I am better off than I would be if I had not done them.  And I believe that my current plan of IF and eating low carb and staying away from sugar (this is huge, as is staying away from all grains) will take care of any remnants of the problem I may have had.  If you have not gathered, I am a very strong proponent of water fasting.  I read that many do it in a supervised setting.  I guess I can understand why some people would want to do that, but I have done fine on my own.  I can testify that fasting has been the biggest help for inflammation that I have found.  It is a long-lost tool, as stated above, and has been used for centuries until modern doctors have developed theories that it is bad for you.  I know one thing, my Bible would not tell me to fast if it was bad for me.
 
Staying away from all GMO foods was also mentioned as extremely important.  "One" of the GMO foods listed that surprised me was zucchini and yellow squash.  I had never heard that, and I love squash.  My solution to that?  I will grow my own as soon as I have the opportunity.  I wish I had a little more back yard room at my new house, but I will find a way.  I could grow them in pots, if nothing else.  Maybe I can find a good source for organically-grown, non-GMO vegetables.  I am sure there are some at farmer's markets.  I will begin to research that.  Perhaps the money I will be saving because I am eating fewer days I can use to buy organic vegetables and meats.  I have heard and read that if you are sensitive to corn, for instance, and you eat beef from cows fed with corn, it will affect you.  Now cows are equipped to eat grass, so it is a little different than me eating the seeds of grasses (which is what grains are, including corn), but many times they are fed with grains loaded with toxins and pesticides and that is passed on to me.  And GMO grains cause animals problems too.  I want to find my meat where it is raised more organically and see if it helps.  I can see some people I know rolling their eyes about this, but if you have struggled with pain issues as much as I have, you get a little more motivated to find out what will relieve it and I read that these things are the cause of chronic pain.  And so far, the things I have done in this vein have helped.  So I believe there is truth to it.  I don't want to be a fanatic, but I do want to get to where I can live without the constant pain and have a semblance of a life again.  So until you have walked in my shoes, you really cannot understand why I would want to go to these lengths.
 
I have a friend who has gone totally to plant-based foods.  She struggles with pain and health issues even more than I do.  But her diet is full of grains.  Her inflammation got so bad recently that she wound up in the hospital because it began to affect her heart.  I didn't try to tell her she needs to be eating meat and not grains, but I did encourage her to read Wheat Belly and told her that grains were a huge source of inflammation for me.  I have seen her health go downhill since she has been eating totally plant-based foods.  Of course fruits and vegetables are great, but I believe it is the grains that are wreaking havoc on her body because now she is eating more of them than ever.  Kind of scary to watch.  She had a life-threatening episode.  She now has pleurisy.  And she just does not look healthy.  I haven't read about pleurisy, but know it is very painful (I am sure it is inflammation related).  Her health does not appear to be improving with eating only plant-based foods (which includes grains).  I believe that is because man has done so much to alter them that they are not in the state God created them.
 
I'm probably being pretty controversial here, so I will stop.  I only know that what I am doing is helping me.  That makes me tend to believe it is true.
 
So, almost done with my day and when it is done, 38 days down, 462 to go!

Monday, October 16, 2017

First Day of IF

Another busy day!  I have had a couple of brief thoughts today about not wanting to fast today, but nothing serious.  As it went through my mind a minute ago I reminded myself that after this week, this is where I will start seeing the results.  I got on the scale Sunday morning and weighed less than a pound more than I weighed on Thursday morning.  That is significant because I had not eaten for 3 days before Thursday morning.  So, after eating Thursday evening, Friday, and Saturday, and therefore having food in my system, I weighed less than a pound more.  That tells me I will likely show a loss this coming Thursday morning.  I ate even less on Sunday than I did on Friday or Saturday, so I don’t believe I did any “damage” then.  (I did not try to eat less; I just ate when I was hungry.)

That main thing that makes me want to keep on with the fasting is the difference in my pain level.  I believe this is healing to me.  I still have a bit of a headache today, but I don’t believe all of the effects of eating the corn before I did the IF last week had been worked out of me.  Hopefully it will after this week, but it did take a while on my extended fast in September.  I don’t remember how many days, but I had a headache for a while into that fast.  (Grains are evil for me!)

I ate nothing this weekend that should have really thrown me off.  The carbiest thing I ate was some of my nut granola.  It has some dried fruit in it, but the percentage of dried fruit in it is small, so I didn’t get that much.  I am not sure if I stayed below 20 grams of carbs every day, but close.  I think it was low carb enough to lose weight if I ate like that all the time; add the days fasting to that and I should be losing for sure.

I find this part of the process of buying the home very nerve-racking.  The inspection was done Saturday and now is the time we go back to the Sellers and tell them what we want fixed for the deal to go forward.  Because I paid (only) asking price after the home was only 6 days on the market, my realtor does not believe I need to be too nit-picky about having them make repairs.  It is definitely a seller’s market right now.  The biggest thing is the roof, and the owner was already talking about that right after they accepted my offer.  And now that my inspector has come back and said it needs a new roof, if they choose not to fix that, it will follow them to another potential buyer because it has to be disclosed that an inspector has said it needs a roof.  So they really have nothing to gain by not putting a new roof on it.  Hopefully the Seller’s insurance company will pay for it, but they may not.  Nothing like hail damage was listed on the inspection report.  Most of the issues were because of the age of the roof. 

Evening

No time to post much after that.  It is bedtime now.  I have made it through my first day of this IF.  I am feeling a little antsy.  I don't know if it is hunger (could be).  My legs are feeling a little restless.  And I am very sleepy.

We are getting a new roof!   It goes on Thursday.  So I am really happy about that.  I'm not sure what else we will go back to the Seller with.  My son-in-law's father is looking over the inspection report for anything that looks like a major thing.

I'm going to call it a night.  These symptoms are a little uncomfortable.  They almost feel like withdrawal.  I just took my evening med (I forgot to take my late afternoon dose and I am late for this dose, so that could have set it off;  when I forget doses it is usually because I haven't been in enough pain to think about it).  Maybe the fast is making me feel the effects sooner.  Anyway, I'm going to try to go to sleep, and if I have trouble, I will take a warm bath.  That's it for tonight.  37 days down; 463 to go.

Sunday, October 15, 2017

A Good, Productive Day

I slept in until 10:00 this morning.  (I knew I was tired last night.)  I got up and started a little cooking right off the bat.  My dog is out of his chicken, so that was first on the agenda.  I also started me some breakfast of 2 sausage patties and 2 scrambled eggs with cheese.  While waiting for that to be done, I worked around the kitchen a bit.

I was thinking I needed to get started on the deviled eggs I have been meaning to make, but then thought that doesn't make sense to do much of that the day before I start another 4-day fast.  I don't think they would keep that well.  So hopefully I will have the energy to do those maybe Wednesday night.

I do want to make at least one dessert today.  I have been hungry for something sweet and had a little temptation last night to go get me some low carb ice cream from the grocery store (because it's easy).  But it is hard for me to practice portion control with that and I would likely end up eating too many carbs that way.  1/2 cup is one thing; more than that is another.  And I have a hard time keeping it to 1/2 cup with that stuff.  (Perhaps something I need to learn. Maybe later.  Too much is at stake right now to get myself tripped up.)

I also plan to make the Green Enchilada Chicken recipe I have mentioned.  It will be at least one meal for today, and I will make meals for the freezer with the rest of it, the rest of the meatloaf I made, and the veggies I bought to add to the freezer meals -- roasted squash, roasted Asparagus, and roasted Brussels sprouts with bacon.

I need to think through what I will have Thursday evening to break the next fast.  I would like to do it with no purging this time.  I still have some vegetable soup in the freezer.  I also have some V-8 juice I bought for the days after breaking the longer fast that I didn't use.  I could have some of it warm to be kind of like a soup to ease my tummy back into food. I don't know if this is something my tummy will get more used to as I go, week after week, but for now I will assume I need to take the reintroduction of food a little more slowly.  But I want to keep it low carb.  No more orange juice.  I would rather purge than cause my blood sugar to spike with that.

I have a lot to get done today, physically.  I am thinking I will set the timer for 45 minutes and work continuously, then sit down and rest a bit; then do it again, and again, and again....  More later.

Later

I set my timer  for the first 45 minutes and when it was done, I turned it off and kept on going for a bit.  I felt fine.  I'm not too fast on getting things done, but at least I am up working.  I am definitely feeling better than I was the beginning of September.  After that I sat down to watch one episode of a program.  I got interrupted during that by my boss who wanted me to find some figures on a case that is going to mediation on Tuesday.  I spent about 20 minutes doing that.  Then finished up my show.

Then I went downstairs to our apartment office.  I decided I wanted to get a second storage closet so we will have somewhere to put our packed boxes.  It is just for one month.  At the same time I gave them our notice that we will not be renewing our lease, so that is done.  That is a little scary, but I know that this complex has way too many 2-bedroom apartments available.  Everyone here wants 1-bedroom.  Most of the residents here are Millennials -- college students and young professionals.  There are a few families and "older" people, but we are few and far between.  Anyway, if I got in a bind, I feel pretty sure they would let me stay month to month.  I don't see that happening, however.  We get our key for the closet tomorrow.  I got that taken care of but did not count it as part of my next 45 minutes.  I got back and started my timer again.

I decided to work on some cooking this time, as well as some cleaning as I went.  I had a near-full dishwasher, so I did a little cleaning on the refrigerator and put those dishes in the dishwasher to finish the load, and started it up.  I switched the laundry.  Then I got started making some "chocolate chip cloud cookies," a recipe from All Day I Dream About Food.  They are an egg-white based meringue cookie with Swerve sweetener, a little cocoa, some sugar free chocolate chips (mine have a little sugar, I think, but are 80% cacao so are not very sweet at all).  I was in the middle of beating my egg whites when my boss texted me again, asking me for more information.  I had to tell him I would get back to him in a bit because I couldn't stop right then.  I got the cookies mixed up and in the oven and went to find the information my boss wanted.  I had about 15 minutes left on my timer.  I found the information he wanted and went back to working in the kitchen.  I was going to get started on the next dish, but I need something at the store to finish that.  So I started packing a box and got a good-sized box packed with serving dishes, etc.  My cookies got done in the midst of that, so I pulled them out and sampled some.  They tasted very sweet!  I think that is mostly because I have not been eating many sweets, and I always find chocolate very rich.  They are light and good and will do nicely to satisfy my sweet tooth.  I ate 4 small cookies -- they have 36 calories each -- and that was almost too much.  That will do me for today on sweets, I think.  I will save the rest for my next 3 days of eating.  I got all that done and that felt like enough for my second 45-minute period.  That's where I am right now.

I got started on watching my next episode during my rest period, but I kept thinking of things I wanted to get done.  So I paused it and got up and did some more stuff.  I guess action breeds more action.  That's something I need to remember.

Evening

For my next 45-minute period (which lasted a lot longer than 45 minutes) I walked to Kroger to get what I needed to make my other recipe and some cleaning products I needed.  I got back and got started on the next dish, which was the Green Chicken Enchilada Casserole.  I got that put together.

In the midst of that, my son-in-law called to talk to me about the work we want to do on my house.  He had spent the day with his dad, who is pretty much an expert at this type of thing, and is going to help me for a reduced rate.  I am so excited about what is going to happen for the first phase, before we move in.  It depends on the price for these things, but the plan is to replace the sliding door in the living room with French doors, getting rid of the paneling in the living room and getting it ready to paint, painting the fireplace brick, doing shiplap or wood panels on the walls on each side of the fireplace, and painting pretty much the whole house.  That will make a huge difference on how this house looks.

I hope to be ready to do phase 2 by late summer.  That would involve updating the kitchen, taking out a wall to open it up and putting in an island, etc.  Again, it depends on what I can afford when, but that is the plan at some point.  The kitchen needs it pretty badly.  The cabinets are not in good shape and opening it up would make such a big difference.

Back to my activities.  Besides the casserole I am roasting squash and am about to get the asparagus ready to roast, which will only take a few minutes.  I need that done so I can put up meals.  I want to keep the asparagus pretty crisp so it won't get too done when a meal is reheated.  Once I get that done, I will get my meals packaged up and into the freezer.  Then I need to tidy the kitchen.  I need to do a little work in my bedroom too, but I'm not sure if that is going to get done tonight.

I never really a lunch.  I ate the 4 cookies and I had a small bag of pistachios (100 calories worth).  That's all I ate since breakfast.  For dinner I had a serving of the enchilada casserole (it was good!) and some roasted squash.  We will see if that holds me.  If I feel like I need something else to eat before bedtime, I will eat it.  Tomorrow starts another 4-day fast.
 
One more exciting thing that happened today -- my daughter and son-in-law put in an offer on a house that is only 10 minutes away from mine.  :)  I pray they get it.  That would be so nice for us to be so close.  I predict they will be over a lot in the summer to make use of the pool.

That's about it for today.  It's been a good, productive day.  36 days down; 364 to go!

Saturday, October 14, 2017

House Inspection and Getting Ideas

I guess I should prepare at least a short post.  My reluctance to do so has nothing to do with how I have done today -- I have done fairly well.  I'm just tired.
 
We were meeting folks for breakfast at 9:30 this morning.  I got up at 8:00 and did a few things -- picking up, packing a box, getting ready, etc.  Then we headed off to have breakfast with Bethany, Tom, Carter, and Tom's dad, Jim.  They were going with us to the house where I was to meet with the inspector so he could go over his findings.  We did that (there were things he found, but nothing huge; as he said, it's a house built in the 70's, so it's going to have some things to fix).  The biggest thing is the roof, which the owner seems to be well aware of.  She is to talk with her insurance company on Tuesday and hopefully a new roof will be installed; if not, hopefully the owner will put one on or there will be an adjustment in price because the inspector said it really needs a new roof.
 
If you remember, this is my first time to see the house in person.  I only got a quick look, but it was what I expected and it is a good house for us.  It is very nice now, in some ways, and has good potential, in other ways.  I love the living room!  My bedroom is nice and big.  My bathroom will need to be redone at some point.  And I want to redo the kitchen at some point.  We have some good ideas of what we want to do with it.
 
After that we went to Lowes for a bit just to look at materials -- flooring, paint colors, cabinets, countertops, appliances, bathroom vanities, etc., etc.  A lot of that stuff will come later, but we want to let our ideas come to life.  That was fun.
 
One reason we did that was because we got done with the house at about 11:30 and I had an appointment to get my hair done at 1:00, so we had a little time to kill.  So after looking around at Lowe's, Stephanie dropped me off to get my hair done.  It took 2-1/2 hours!!!  I got a color, highlight, and cut.  It looks good!  The only thing I do not really like is she put some of the hair color on my eyebrows because we talked about how my eyebrows had gotten really light on the outside of my eyes.  The color it came out was too light, in my opinion -- my daughter agrees.  So I will have to get a little color and put it on there to darken them up a little.  Maybe I will post a picture of the hair the next day I am "fixed up."  ☺
 
We got home from that and I was pretty hungry, not having eaten since breakfast.  For breakfast I had an omelette at IHOP with poblano peppers, onions, cheese and avocado.  If you don't tell them not to at IHOP, they put pancake batter in their omelette to make it fluffier.  I told them I wanted just "real eggs" and explained my problem with wheat so they would be very careful.  It was good, and I ate the whole omelette.  When I got home at around 4:00, I had a big slice of meatloaf and some salad.  I ate some of my nut granola, too.  I was still hungry later and had some nuts.  So that is why I say I did fairly good -- I probably had a few too many nuts.  I was too tired to cook this afternoon, so I had to use what I had.
 
I wanted to nap a while, but never fell asleep.  I watched some TV and toward the end of the evening I packed a couple of boxes.  My goal was to pack up the empty boxes in my room.  But I have nowhere to put them and it is a little frustrating.
 
Tomorrow I need to do a lot more around the apartment -- cooking, cleaning, and packing.  So that is the plan.
 
I did not have a third meal.  So I think for one of the 3 days a week I eat, today was not bad.  Could have been better, but pretty good.
 
That's it for tonight.  35 days down; 465 to go!
 
 

Friday, October 13, 2017

I Like Intermittent Fasting

Again, so busy today, but want to get a few thoughts down.

I found out you do need to start out more slowly even after 4 days of fasting.  Let’s just say I had to make a few trips to the bathroom last night.  :/  Better go a little lighter the first night next time.  I have been okay today.

I am trying to keep it very low carb, as I said.  This morning I had some more of my Ham and Swiss Pie and some bacon.  I was not hungry for and did not have a mid-morning snack.  I got my meatloaf mixed up, but while it was cooking the oven started smoking a bit again, and I needed to leave the house, so I turned it off.  It is mostly cooked, but needs a bit more.  I left it in the oven while it was cooling off and covered it and put it in the refrigerator before leaving.  I said that to say, I did not bring that for lunch today, so I went downstairs and got a half-pound combination of brisket and sausage at Dickey’s Barbecue, along with some green beans.  I asked for the sauce on the side and they gave me two containers of sauce (probably held around 2-3 tablespoons each).  I used possibly (no more than) one-third of one container, so I think I kept my carbs very low for the meal.  I don’t know if I will be hungry for a snack.  If I am, I will have one; if I’m not, I won’t.  I am trying to make sure to drink my water on my eating days as much as I do on my fasting days.

More later.
 
Evening
 
I did get a little hungry this afternoon, but had no time to go get me anything.  I had some peanuts out of a coworkers jar, which she keeps out to share.  That held me okay.
 
I got home after 8:00 and, interestingly, I wasn't that hungry.  I wasn't "not hungry," I just didn't care that much.  I put my meatloaf back in the oven and tried to crisp up the bacon a little bit.  I warmed up the rest of the vegetables I didn't eat last night and ate those.  I was ready for my meatloaf, and the bacon wasn't crisp yet, but I cut me off a piece and microwaved it (it was done in the middle, at least on the end piece I had).  The bacon did not crisp in the microwave either, so I just didn't eat that part.  I will finish crisping it when I get the oven cleaned out tomorrow.  The meatloaf was good!!!  I would show you a picture, but it doesn't look like it is supposed to -- because the bacon isn't crisp.  But I will share the recipe, in case anyone is interested.  The recipe was from a blog called Buns in My Oven.  I haven't followed the blog, but the recipe was really good!  Definitely a keeper.  The texture was good, which doesn't always happen when you can't use bread crumbs in your recipe.  I'm not sure where the kind of sweet flavor came from, other than the little bit of reduced sugar ketchup on top.  But it seemed like there was some sweetness in the meat mixture.  I don't know, but it was good.  Here is the recipe.  At this point I am trying to decide if I am done for tonight.  I'm not really hungry, but might be before I go to bed.  If I had a dessert made I would eat some of that.  But I'm too tired to make one night.
 
I was getting my dinner together and there on the island was a bag of sour gummy straws (much like the gummy worms I got into last weekend).  My daughter loves them.  I took the bag to her and told her to keep it in her room.  If I have something sweet, it will be something legal.
 
I am quite amazed about my ambivalence toward food.  Of course it sounds good and tastes good, but I don't sit around thinking about eating.  And I'm not that hungry.  During long fasts I would get to where I would dream about what I would eat when I got done (at times).  I'm not doing that so far with the IF.  I feel like this is going to work well, and it feels like my addiction to food is getting less and less.  I think if I ate sugar or something it would kick in, but if I stay low carb, that seems to make a difference.  Time will tell, but again, I am pretty amazed.  And I feel much better, physically and mentally, when I am not eating too much and I am not warring all the time with wanting to eat when I know I have had enough.
 
More progress was made today toward my home purchase.  I completed my loan application and sent it in to the mortgage company.  I had already been pre-approved, but now the loan goes to underwriting where they verify everything.  I keep extremely good records, so I do not foresee a problem.  If I had it to do over, I might have chosen a different lender.  This one did something that made me question their integrity (nothing that will affect my loan), but hopefully it was a mistake and not intentional.  We put in my offer that our projected closing would be November 10.  Whether that will happen that quickly remains to be seen.  I guess now I hope it does because we need time to do some painting before hopefully moving in by December 1.  My son-in-law asked if Thanksgiving was going to be at my new house.  I don't know if we can get the painting and everything done in time for that, but maybe.  Maybe we can still have Thanksgiving dinner there, even if not fully living there.  It all depends on getting the first work on the house done before we move in -- like painting, possibly refinishing the hardwood floors, etc.  We will for sure have Christmas in the new house.  I want to be able to move in and immediately get the house decorated.  My grandson is getting more and more aware of things, so I want things to be festive.  Next year will be even a bigger difference.
 
Having the pool and back yard makes me actually look forward to summer (I usually do not look forward to summer in Texas!).  We can have family cookouts in the back yard and swimming.  There is a covered patio, as well as a small pergola where we might put a small fire pit.  There is not much yard for other things, but it will be fun to have the pool.  I plan to make use of it for fitness.  There will be no excuses!!
 
I ended my evening with a few almonds and that was it.  I think it was a very in control eating day after not eating for 4 days.  We will see how the rest of my weekend goes.  We are meeting for breakfast/brunch in the morning.  That's it for tonight.  34 down; 466 to go!

Thursday, October 12, 2017

Things are Moving Along

Morning
 
I got to thinking last night about an issue with my IF.  The last time I ate was sometime Sunday evening.  If I wait to eat until tomorrow morning, my fast will not be 4 days, but 4-1/2 days.  If I did that every week, I do think that would be too much.  I only want to do 4 until pain issues are settled down on an ongoing basis, and then I will back it off to at least 3-1/2 days or 3 days.  To do 4 days, I really need to eat this evening.  So that is what I am going to do.  After work tonight (a little later in the evening, if I do not work late) I will eat something on the "lighter" side, and then that will ease me into eating a full meal Friday morning for breakfast.   I said I would not need to be as careful about breaking a fast after only 4 days, but I think I will break it with something like eggs and possibly a soft vegetable.  Not a full meal with meat and roughage like salad, or nuts or anything like that.  That way I can see if it causes any purging and it will be at night instead of before work in the morning.  I think I should be fine, but I can make sure this first time.  So that is the plan -- eat at somewhere around 7:00 or so this evening.

I use my phone for my alarm, and this morning, instead of having my phone right beside me, I had left it beside my chair last night.  So when my first alarm went off, I had to get up to turn it off.  I had intentions of sleeping through my first (6:00 a.m.) and second (6:30 a.m.) alarms like I have been when I work a lot (I don't technically have to be to work until 9:00 a.m., although I have been getting there earlier most mornings), but by the time I turned off my alarm and went to the restroom, I got to thinking maybe I should go ahead and get up this morning.  I can go ahead and get my makeup on, etc., and then I can mix my meatloaf I've been planning to make.  I can either put it in the oven this morning, if I have time, or have it mixed and ready and cook it after work.  That way if I work late and don't feel like doing it then, it will already be done.  So that is the plan.  More later.
 
Afternoon
 
I just gave my realtor the checks for the title company.  I have my inspection set for Saturday morning.  Things are moving along!!
 
This will be my first fast in recent months that I have had a planned stop time.  The other times I have decided fairly quickly it was time to stop, so there was no anticipating "I will get to eat tonight" or something like that.  I haven't given much thought to food today, but I do get to eat tonight.  I don't even think I have to work late (my boss has an event to go to tonight -- I love those times!).  I meant to take my egg casserole out of the freezer this morning and let it thaw in the refrigerator all day, but I forgot.  It's okay; I can just thaw it in the microwave.  That and some vegetables is what I plan to have tonight.  I will have some casserole in the morning, most likely, but will likely cook me some bacon or sausage to go with it.  I want to eat enough on the days I am eating, as long as it is not carby stuff.
 
I meant to post this morning, my weight this morning was 260.4.  I will be interested to see what happens in the coming weeks with the IF and eating low carb.  I don't know if I ever said, but the last weight I posted on my fast I believe was somewhat of a fluke.  I had that low weight that morning, but for the rest of the days after that until I broke the fast, it was up in the 255 range.  I was gaining more than I wanted to after the fast, but I definitely was retaining water because my hands and feet were extremely puffy during that time.  Plus I had last weekend totally off-track with sugar, etc.  So I don't know how to read this morning's weight.  But we will see how it goes from here.
 
As for eating again after this 4-day fast, I do not feel out of control.  I do not feel like I want to eat everything in sight.  I believe I can maintain the low-carb lifestyle I want, especially if I have a plan and have foods made ahead of time.  I did not get my meatloaf mixed up this morning, but I did get my vegetables chopped so it will be easy to put together.  And since I do not have to work late tonight, I shouldn't mind doing that tonight.  I will drop by the grocery store on the way home and pick up a couple of veggies to cook to put in meals with the meatloaf.  I should have taken my chicken out to thaw this morning; then I could make the Green Enchilada Chicken recipe I have planned, but hopefully I can do that tomorrow night.  The good thing about this IF schedule is I do not need nearly as many meals planned and put away.  Two different dinner items a week is enough.  I will eat out at least one meal on the weekend.  If I only have to make two entrees per week, plus some veggies, plus some breakfasts (most times I just make those when I am going to eat them), that is all the cooking I should have to do during the phase.  Plus any (low-carb) desserts I want to cook and have on hand.  I still also want to make the deviled eggs I have been planning on.  They are good for snacks and to supplement a meal.  As long as I am eating protein and fat and only the carbs I have from veggies or controlled portions of nuts, I should be losing weight pretty well.  I may want to make one extra entrée to build up my freezer stock.  I want to be prepared for the unexpected.  I also want to have a meal in the freezer at work at all times.
 
This will be a busy weekend.  I have to meet the inspector at the new house for him to show me any findings.  Speaking of which, I am hoping they find the house needs a roof.  If they say it does, the Seller's insurance will pay for it.  If it has a new roof, my homeowner's insurance will cost $1,000 less per year!  My son-in-law and his father may be going with me so we can talk about things I would like to do to the house and how much I can expect that to cost, so we may meet for brunch and then meet the inspector there during the last 30 minutes of his inspection.  I have an appointment for a haircut and color/highlight at 1:00.  Then I need to get home and do some cleaning, packing, and cooking.  Sunday will be more of the same.  We need to pack in earnest now.  I need to do some good cleaning for my own peace of mind.  Of course, nothing is going to be very tidy until we move.  Boxes are going to have to be stacked wherever we can find room.  I'm trying not to get another storage closet.  We have less than a month to grin and bear it.

Evening

I had to run an errand after work and did drop by the grocery store.  I ate as planned when I got home.  I had some of the Ham and Swiss Pie I made over the weekend.  I also heated one of the vegetable plates I had put in the freezer.  Those containers hold a lot and it was too much for one meal, so I ate half of it.  I can eat the other half some other meal this weekend.  I was still wanting a little something after that, so I heated one of the small containers of vegetable soup I had in the freezer.  I had a few bites of my nut granola while I was waiting, but I did keep that to a minimum because I didn't want many carbs.  Having some deviled eggs made would have been nice because it would have been next to no carbs and would have helped fill me up a little more.

I was not really stomach hungry when I ate, but once you make the decision you are going to, of course food is going to taste good.  Except for dealing with the headache some of the week, I felt pretty good this week.  Hopefully I will not have that problem next week.  I have had more energy this week than I had at the end of my other fast.  I think that was because of high potassium.  It makes you extremely tired.  Pain was much improved this week and the main thing I struggled with was my heel.  Not that there wasn't other pain, but it can be so much worse, I don't pay much attention to it.

I haven't done my meatloaf yet; I'm trying to motivate myself to get up and do it.  I will be glad I did.  Who knows how late I will have to work tomorrow night.

Guess I will shut this down and go try to get it done.  I am optimistic about the IF working for me.  When I fast only four days, I don't feel like I can eat a lot to compensate for all the days I did not eat on a long fast (which ends up backfiring on you).  I know for this to work, I need to eat smart and I feel willing to do that.  I will be interested to see if there is progress over the next month.  I pray there is.

That's it for tonight.  33 down; 467 to go!

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

I've Come a Long Way, Baby!!

Morning

I am so busy again today.  There is no let-up in sight.  But I wanted to take a minute and get some thoughts down.  It helps me center.

Doing fine on IF today.  Had a little thought late last night that I wanted to eat, but I knew it would pass.  I gave some thought to whether 4 days a week is too much.  It may be.  For at least this week, I do not believe it is.  Mainly because I need to try to get out of my system what is causing the headache and other pain.  I believe it was the corn, but I am going to pay much more attention this coming week.  If I have a headache after I have been free of them, I need to pay attention to what I ate right before the headache started and see if I can identify other triggers.  I know it is diet related.  No doubt in my mind.  I hope I am done with them by the end of tomorrow.  If I was eating, they could go on for a month, but usually fasting gets whatever caused it out of my system and causes the inflammation to settle down.  Just not sure if it does it in four days.

Which leads me to the conclusion that four days is not too much as long as I continue to have significant pain issues.  When that is better on an ongoing basis (which hopefully won't be too long), I think I can cut it back to 3.  Even 3-1/2, if that worked for me.  Then as my weight is dropping regularly, I can cut it back to 2.  I don’t know if going below 2 would be a good thing or not.  Fasting is the best tool I have found.  I am just learning how to use it properly and how to not undo the benefits.

I believe I need to stay below 20 grams of carbs per day (which keeps you in ketosis) until pain issues have improved on an ongoing basis and hormonal issues seem to have improved a little more (the way I would know that is weight loss would be easier).  The Wheat Belly author says that insulin resistance does heal after a while and you can add in a few more carbs (the right kind) after that.  But if you are resistant to weight loss with 45 gm of carbs per day, you should drop them below 20 gm.  I think I am one of those people, at least until I do some more healing.  And I am not going to heal if I do not stop flooding my body with too many carbs, and sugar and grains, in particular.

I need to find recipes for this Thanksgiving that will keep me satisfied and on track.  One day of eating too many carbs is too many if it causes pain that has been settled down to return.  I am not going to be reasonably free from pain if I do not eat as cleanly as possible.  I have proved that too many times.  Just this past week, even the first few days after breaking the fast, some pain was back.  It may be weight-related, somewhat, but I think that time it was more related to what I was eating that set off inflammation.  Why do I think that?  Because after 2 days of fasting again, my pain is already immensely better.  I do not believe I could have lost enough weight to make that much difference.  I am going to try to keep detailed records of when pain seems to increase and what I ate before that happened.  And watch how it does at certain weights, as well.

Afternoon

Food smells good today.  Not that that is unusual; just noticing it more today.  But I know I just have one more day and I am fine.  Still a little hungry, at times.  Nothing bad, though.

We are waiting to hear about my offer on the home.  My realtor said the agent said the offer was good and he was advising his client to accept it, but we have not gotten final word, yet.  I wish they would just tell us already!!!  Hopefully at the end of this post I will have the news.

Evening

Another late-ish night.  I got off at 7:50 p.m.  I got to the parking garage at work and my miles to go indicator said I had 1 mile left in my tank when I started the car, and 0 when I was halfway down from the top level.  I know it goes a bit on zero, but I went to the nearest gas station.  I sure did not want to stop and get gas after work, but more than that, I sure did not want to run out of gas on the way home!!  I meant to go to another gas station so I could get a car wash, but I didn't want to chance it since it was a couple of miles away.

My pain is doing much better than it was at the first of the week.  Only a slight headache, at times, today.  Except for my heel.  It continues to hurt.  I had been wearing open-backed shoes most of the time, but wore my ankle boots today.  They have gotten somewhat loose on my feet, but they still bothered my right heel.  I meant to ask my boss which was the best day to try to go to the doctor.  I am going to see if I can get in next Tuesday when he is in mediation all day.

Work continued to be extremely busy all day.  It can be a little frustrating because I will be pushing to try to finish one project and am pulled away numerous times to do other things.  But such is the nature of practicing law.  We did settle one case we have been spending a lot of time on, but there are plenty more.  Including one about to go to trial.

I am going to be trying to get ready to move while we are preparing to go to trial.  It's going to be a busy couple of months coming up.  Who knows, maybe it will settle.  But half of this case settled almost two years ago and this party refused to settle.  So I don't know if that will happen this time.  Trial is November 13.

I saved the last piece of news until the end of the post.  The Seller accepted my offer!!!!  Woohoo!!!!!  I have found my home!  It has a pool and I came in $13,000 under budget.  :D

My House
 
Fireplace and Original Hardwood Floors
 
I have a pool!!!
 
It is hitting me that I -- just me -- by myself -- am buying a house.  It is by my own hard work and the grace of God that I am able to do this.  I'm pretty proud of that.  I don't need a man to do this.  I still want a good man, mind you, but I have been able to take care of myself and my family (again, by the grace of God and His provision).  I am a far cry from the woman who suffered from battered wife syndrome when I left my marriage in 2003.  I have come a long way baby!!

It's been a good day.  32 down, 468 to go!

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Unfulfilled Dreams

What a day!  I spent the day at other attorneys' offices with a group of co-counsel, typing notes and outlining witness questions on my laptop for an upcoming trial.  These meetings usually last for about 4 hours.  I got there 30 minutes early to set up and when the meeting was over, my boss wanted to stay there and get the meeting report he always does after these meetings done while we were there, as well as a couple of other things.  He had another meeting to go to at 5:30 within walking distance, so he wanted to stay there.  So I left there at about 5:30, but he wanted me to go back to the office and do a couple of other things.  I did that and left my office at about 7:00.  They brought in lunch for the group (sandwiches), but of course, I am on one of my IF days.  I told them I could not eat wheat and I had a plan for my own meal.  (I did; there wasn't going to be one.)  I tried to drink water while there, and did, but probably not as much as I would have had I not been there doing that.  Not much of a free minute.  Anyway, it kind of wore me out.  We are going to be doing the same thing for at least the next couple of meetings.
 
So my day of IF went fine.  I didn't have much time to think about it.  I didn't really feel that hungry.  I did have a bad headache, which I blame on the corn I ate when breaking my fast and again on Sunday.  Not planning to do that again!  There wasn't much I could do about the headache.  I didn't bring anything with me to take, and probably should not take anything, but it was enough of a headache to make me put head in hand every chance I got.  Most of the time, though, my hands were on my keyboard.
 
We had plans to go look at another house this evening.  I knew I probably would not be able to get away, so my daughter and realtor went.  They both think this might be the one and, based on the pictures and their description, I think so too.  I am going to try to get my offer in by Noon tomorrow.  Most people will wait to go look on the weekend, so I hope if I put in a good enough offer, they will just go ahead and accept mine.  My realtor said the listing agent said there were no offers on the property yet.  The house does have a pool.  It is not decorated exactly like I would like but it mostly needs some cosmetic changes.  It has the original hardwood floors in most of the house.  It is not too big, like I've been afraid a few of them would be (after all, at some point it will be just me unless I get married), but it was also not too small.  It has a nice double garage as well as a double carport, so we can use part of the garage for storage, if we want to, and still have covered parking for both cars.  It does not have a bathtub in the Master, which is something I wanted, but I will just have to take my baths in the other bathroom.  Or put a bathtub in the Master sometime.  All in all, I think it will be a good home for me.  It is in a better part of town as far as being near where my youngest daughter and son-in-law (and grandson) will be moving and near where my cousins, whom I am close to, have moved to.  Other parts of Garland would have been pretty far away from both of them.  It is also very close to a rail station so I can ride the train to work and miss traffic, save on parking, gas, and save wear and tear on my car.  The other thing on my list that it does not have is a gas stove, but that is not a deal breaker.  It does have a fireplace, which was another thing on my list I wanted.  The kitchen is not as updated as I would like, but that is something I will do as soon as I can.  We will want to paint before we move in because they have chosen different colors for different rooms and they are not neutral and it smells like they are smokers.  I really would like to have everything a nice, not-too-dark gray.  We can restain the hardwood floors if we want to, to make them have more of a gray tint, which is what I wanted.  I will likely have to buy a refrigerator, but that is true in many houses you buy.  I would probably want to update the appliances at some point, anyway.
 
I'm praying my offer will be accepted this time.  I am ready to get settled!
 
My pain is already improving somewhat with two days of IF.  I really need to pay attention this time to what sets it off, but I really think the main thing was corn.  I did not eat that much dairy.  The carbiest thing I ate, besides the corn products, was some beans and a little rice (until I had the sugary stuff, of course).  No time or energy for any cooking tonight.  Maybe tomorrow night.  :/  But I am still putting back for my down payment, so the extra in my paycheck is appreciated, even if I get tired of working late.
 
I was thinking about someone close to me in the middle of the night last night and how the biggest dream they have had for their life has not happened yet.  My heart was hurting so much about that, I had a hard time going back to sleep.  It also occurred to me that life continues to pass me by without my dream of a fulfilling marriage coming to pass.  If I keep working this much, there is no time or energy to do anything much about that.  So at some point I want to slow down, at least some.  I could give my boss 2 nights a week and say I want to go home on time the other 3 unless there was an absolute emergency.  This is time I cannot get back and I really do want time to start building relationships.  I'm going to continue while I am in this phase of trying to buy the house and paying off debt, but after that, I want more me time.  I want to improve my physical condition enough where I feel up to getting out, even if I am working late some nights.  That's a big part of it. So I plan to continue with my plans of IF and hopefully my weight will keep dropping, with no gaining it back, and my pain continues to improve.  Then I can increase exercise and that will also help my energy once I have built some endurance.  I was imagining myself walking a nature trail like I used to, riding my bike, and walking my dog.  If I can keep my weight moving down, one way or another, I know that can happen.  I pray that this other person's dream comes to pass fairly quickly, too.  :(
 
I think I am definitely going to have to go see the doctor about my heel.  It continues to hurt and is quite swollen.  I keep putting that off....
 
That's it for tonight.  I'm beat.  31 days down, 469 to go.

Monday, October 9, 2017

Pulling It Together and IF

I started a post yesterday and didn’t finish it.  I started out back on track and did well until the middle of the afternoon and then made some excuses, acted on impulse, and pretty much blew off the rest of the day.  I don’t want to over-analyze why these things happen, but I do want to think it through to avoid it happening “next time.”  It started Friday night.  The biggest things that happened then were that I was exhausted after a long week (which is a huge trigger for me) and I acted on impulse (by eating the gummy worms just because they were there.  There is something else that could have helped, which I will talk about in a minute.

On Saturday, part of the problem was we were in a festive atmosphere, there was not enough food I could eat (really, not enough food in general), and I did not make sure there was food around that I could have, that would have given me alternatives.  I think that was my biggest mistake this weekend.  I was already kind of craving something sweet.  If I had had some kind of dessert made that I could eat -- or maybe even some good fruit -- I would have had no problem choosing it and staying away from the other stuff.  (The same goes for Friday night.  If I had had something available, I would have never gotten into those gummy worms.  I still can’t believe I cheated on gummy worms!)  The biggest thing I did Saturday was I drank sodas.  I had a Topo Chico (sparkling mineral water) there for me, but I drank soda.  And I have never been one to drink my calories in the past.  I really don’t want to substitute a diet soda in a situation like that because they are equally bad for you.  But maybe it would have helped.  The biggest thing, though, is if I had had a sweet alternative for me, I don’t think I would have been tempted by the sodas, either.  So that was Saturday.

Sunday, I was doing better.  I had made some good choices until mid-afternoon.  Then an impulse hit me (spelled “ice cream”), it was too readily available, and I ate it.  Then I just kind of gave up the rest of the day and had more sodas.  Again, I think if I had had an alternative that is okay for me to eat, I would not have done that.

Fatigue was a factor all three days.

So, here are some things I learned:

1.      It is imperative that I am prepared for those times when I get that tired.  If I have to cook myself something then, it is likely not going to happen and I end up making a bad choice.

2.      I need to have something “sweet” on hand for these times.  I have plenty of recipes for desserts I can have.  I need to make some up and have some in the freezer for just these occasions.

3.      I should have made sure exactly what was going to be served at the party and made sure there was enough for me to eat.  A piece of barbecued chicken and some salad just did not do it for me, especially when I did not eat breakfast.  The only other thing to eat that was not sweet was some pasta salad, which I could not have.  I should have made sure what was being brought by other people and made sure I had good alternatives for myself.  (Another problem came from the fact that someone said they were going to bring something – deviled eggs, which would have been great for me – and they didn’t end up bringing them.)

4.      I should have made sure I had a sweet alternative at the party.

5.      We should have divvied up the sodas we had left over after the party and sent them home with other people.  Having a cooler “full” of bottled soft drinks was too tempting.  One thing we had was those little bitty “old-fashioned” bottles of Coca-Cola.  I used to love those (although they don’t taste the same as they used to).  Since I helped provide the drinks for the party, I should have provided things that were not so tempting to me.  I’m not a big root beer fan – I should have left it with root beers and crème sodas, neither of which I am that fond of.  If I had had my own sweets and those kind of drinks, I would have been plenty happy with a Topo Chico.

6.      I need more meals in the freezer.  I still do not have enough and I was so tired this weekend, I didn’t get that much cooked.  That left me in a dangerous situation because I was so tired and I needed better alternatives of things to eat.

Another thing that trips me up:  we ordered On the Border Saturday night.  I ordered wisely.  They have a dinner called "Queso Chicken," which is a grilled chicken breast topped with (gluten-free) queso and avocado strips.  It comes with a small side (at least the to-go portion was small) of cilantro rice and some grilled veggies.  The thing that tripped me up is they always send tortilla chips with your order, along with their hot sauce (which I love).  I did not eat any of that Saturday night, but I should have thrown them out, because Sunday night I gave in and ate them.  Next time I will tell them not to give me any.
 
As I have said before, planning ahead is imperative for me.  Next time, I plan to be prepared.

After the “off” weekend I had, I decided to go ahead and start with the IF this week.  I need to pull it back together and I need to clean some of this stuff out of my body because it has increased my pain levels.

I have to admit, when I decided I was going to start a fast today, I had thoughts that I would just keep on going a while.  But I really think it is more beneficial if I do not do that.  I have to learn what to do during the “eating” times.  I have the fasting down.  I can do it.  But I have to learn what to do the rest of the time.  So, I will do my fasting days this week and be ready for the eating days at the end of the week.  Work permitting, I will cook what I was planning to cook over this past weekend and have those meals ready for the end of this week.  If I have time, I will put more meals up in the freezer.  I will make a dessert or two and freeze some of it for times like I had this weekend.  (One thing I can do is buy a couple of “mixes” from Wheat Free Market” that make mixing up a little batch of cookies or brownies really easy, so if I am caught off guard, I have something I can prepare quickly.)

The thing is, as busy as my life is right now with work, house-hunting, getting ready to move, etc., I have to be prepared.  And I have to have my body prepared for what is coming because it is still difficult to do what I need to do physically and we are about to move.  I need to get better.

I need to get it through my head that I cannot eat corn.  It gives me a headache and body aches.  I have a pretty significant headache today and it is from eating the tortilla chips last night.  That’s what I get for blowing off the day.  Corn is not my friend.

So, live and learn.  If I learn from it, then those two days do not mean anything in the broad scheme of things.  I just have to make sure it stops there and I do learn from it.

Later
 
I got some cleaning done yesterday, though not nearly enough.  I still need to do more.  I did a little packing over the weekend, too.  It is hard to make myself pack when I don’t know where I am going, but I don’t want to be caught when moving time gets here and be behind on that.  I am packing things
I know I can do without until we move, and holding out things I know I use on a regular basis.
 
I did make something yesterday I call “Ham and Swiss Pie.”  I adapted a recipe called “Crab and Swiss Pie,” so that is where the name came from.  It is basically an egg casserole with eggs, ham, cream, and Swiss cheese.  I had some yesterday and I put the rest up in the freezer for use for future meals.  Since I was going to be fasting, I thought I had better instead of just storing it in the fridge.
 
I bought a vacuum sealer recently and I wonder if I should have used it on the Ham and Swiss Pie instead of the containers I froze it in.  I guess we will see how it turns out.  I know you can freeze eggs, because sometimes I buy the Jimmy Dean meat lovers frozen breakfast trays.

I am planning to make a bacon-wrapped meatloaf and a Green Chicken Enchilada (low-carb) casserole, so I will try to get that done before this IF is over.  I say try because I never know when I will have to work late and I didn't have the energy to do it tonight.  I also need to make up some vegetables so I can package full meals in the freezer.
 
It kind of amazes me that I can do this fasting thing so easily.  I have been hungry today, but it's like when I decide to fast, that doesn't bother me as much.  I expect it, I drink down water, and I just turn my mind away from eating.  Why can't I be like that other times?
 
I am tired tonight, but that is partly the fast.  I am switching over from burning the food I eat to burning fat stores and that takes a couple of days.  That is going to be the tough part about IF.  I have to go through that more.  I think if I were to keep myself in ketosis most of the time, it would be easier.   With IF, instead of thinking about the fact that my hunger will be over in a couple of days, I can just keep in mind that I can have something to eat in a couple of days.  It is all a mind thing.
 
I am guessing weight loss is more of a mind thing than anything.  If I can keep my mind as focused when allowing myself to eat as I do when I am fasting, that will be the key.
 
That's it for tonight.  So I guess this is finally my 30th day.  30 days down, 470 to go.

Saturday, October 7, 2017

Carter's Birthday Party!

Going to have to take my 30th day back because I screwed up last night.  We had bought some stuff for the birthday party, per my daughter's request.  Of all things, I got into the sour gummy worms last night.  Yes, gummy worms.  Yuck.  They weren't even good.  They were just there.  It was an impulse and it came about from being so tired.  I need to make it a rule not to eat on impulse.  I need to give myself time to think food choices over, and if I still really want something, then I can go ahead and make the choice.  But it likely would not have been spent on something like gummy worms!!!  I should at least make it something I really want.  Hopefully, lesson learned.
 
I fell asleep in the chair last night and woke up at about 11:30 and moved on to the bed.  It took a few minutes to fall asleep because my tailbone was hurting.  I slept pretty hard after that except my cat woke me up at 7:00 a.m. and I ended up getting and staying up (although that had not been the plan).  I got to thinking of the presents that needed to be wrapped, and I was going to have to go buy some tape to do that.  I may have some in my Christmas gift wrap box, but it was very high in my closet shelf and I could not have gotten it down without help (or a major avalanche, most likely).  So I went off to Kroger at around 7:30 this morning and got tape and more gummy worms to make sure my daughter had enough for what she had in mind for the party.  :)  I will send those home with her.
 
As I said, I need to make myself something sweet that is "legal" this weekend.  I was also thinking I should make a couple of fat bomb recipes.  Fat bombs are recommended on ketogenic diets, including on Wheat Belly.  That way I can have a snack without adding to my carb count.  I will lose with eating the fat bombs; not with eating too many carbs.
 
I figured there would be enough temptation to eat today, so I haven't eaten breakfast.  I think my daughter is planning on grilled chicken for the birthday party (they have a gas grill by the pool where we are having the party).  She asked me to get a side to go with that and suggested a salad.  So that's what I did.  What I didn't know was that my son-in-law's mom brought a pasta salad and that was all there was, except cookies and birthday cupcakes.  Some chicken, salad and pasta salad for a pretty big crowd.  So, all I had for lunch was some barbecued chicken and some salad.  That would have been great except there were some bottled drinks -- the little old-fashioned bottles of Coca-Cola, root beer, etc.  I had some of that and some candy from the snack table.  If I had known that was all there was going to be, I would have eaten breakfast.
 
So, this day is not really one I can count as one where I stayed on track.  I will get it together tomorrow.
 
The party went really well.  My daughter decorated everything with a cute fishing theme and made all the decorations herself.  It was mostly family there (both sides), with a couple of friends.  Carter got showered with presents, toys and clothes, and was so cute "opening" his presents.  They would put a gift bag in front of him and encourage him to pull out some of the tissue paper.  When he pulled some out everyone would cheer for him and he thought that was the game.  He would flap around that tissue paper and everyone would cheer, and he would grin.  With so many presents (and most of the people seeming to go to Target), I was surprised that there was not one duplication either of clothing or toys.  He should have enough clothes a toys to last him quite a while!  And Christmas is almost here!  There were also wrapped presents and they would start tearing into one for him and he see a peek of what was inside and start tearing it a little more.  When he got done, they sat all his toys around him and he seemed quite happy with them.  He's such a little angel.  He was pretty tired by that time, but never more than a little whimper occasionally.  His Auntie Tricia helped put him to sleep before it was finally over.
 
 
 
Speaking of Christmas, both my daughter (Bethany) and son-in-law (Tom), and me and my other daughter (Stephanie) plan to move out of our apartments by the end of the year.  Our leases are up at the same time.  I hope to be moved by December 1 (the bulk of it) so we can have Christmas in my new house.  We can use the rest of the month to clean and move odds and ends that may be left, re-paint walls we painted, etc.   Bethany and Tom are also going to try to buy a home, with a little help from Tom's parents, possibly, with the down payment.  It will be a partial investment for them.  So we should both have "new" houses by the first of the year.  If that doesn't work out for them, they at least plan to get in a rent house instead of an apartment, until they can save up their down payment.  I hope to find a good place for me and Stephanie very soon.  I am so ready to get moved.  So are Bethany and Tom.  They are running out of places to put things and Carter is going to need a yard to play in very soon.  As I said, he is not walking yet.  He has been sort of crawling -- he finds a way to get around -- but today, he out and out crawled a good way to get to one of his toys.  It was one of those moments for Bethany.  I am looking forward to seeing what happens over the next few months.
 
I got home from the party and was feeling quite tired.  I knew the first thing on the agenda was to take a nap.  I sat down to unwind a little bit and fell asleep fairly quickly.  I don't know what time we got done with the party -- probably 2:00 or so -- and I napped until 5:00!  I was sooooo tired.
 
I did not allow anyone to come up to my apartment.  We had all we needed down at the pool, and Stephanie and I brought down what other things we decided we needed.  I really need to clean.  I say I.  We need to clean, and I need Stephanie to do the bigger share of it.  I have tried to do some cleaning here and there in the kitchen this week, but I worked so much, it was hard to get much done.  The rest of the main living area I guess is not that bad except that it is inhabited by dogs and way too much stuff.  I have several pieces of equipment for Carter when he visits -- a pack 'n play for him to nap in, a high chair and a little play toy he can sit in and push around with his feet, since he is not walking yet (both of which we took down to the party).  There are also some boxes sitting around that I have packed, and a couple of empty boxes I have brought home (and a bunch more empty boxes on the patio.  There is just no place to put anything and I was embarrassed for anyone to see our mess.  That is one reason I am so ready to get moved.  I will have room to put away Carter's equipment when it is not needed, and we can keep the living area in much better order.  Not to mention, Maggie -- my daughter's big dog -- can stay in the yard most of the time, and Cas can go out often to work off energy.  He probably cannot be an outdoor dog since he is a small breed, but he will be able to get outside often, anyway.  And then there is the cat.  I know he wants to be outside.  I feel a little afraid to let him do that because he is not used to it and he could get out and get run over, but I know he will be happier if he can get outside.  It should make the living environment inside the house much more pleasant without all the clutter and the animals.  I am so ready!  Now if we can just find a house and get my offer accepted!
 
I am going to finish out the day without doing any further damage on my eating.  The plan is to get things in a little better order because tomorrow we are going to go look at some houses and I need to do some cooking (and get it all the way cleaned up before the week starts again).
 
So 29 days and holding.  I will get that 30th day tomorrow!