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Thursday, February 26, 2015

Feeling Stronger


I finished out on plan yesterday.  The only thing I did not do, as far as what I consumed (once I got started), was I didn’t drink my water.  I am on track so far this morning and trying to drink down water each time I go to the restroom.  I didn’t do that every time, but drank a lot more than usual.  It seems like I went to the restroom every 10 minutes.


I spent a while this morning planning my meals from now until vacation, which is how long I will be on Medifast.  I did that for 2 reasons.  First, I do better with a plan.  I can mark off each meal and it satisfies something in me to do that.  The second reason is, I need to know what more MF foods I need to order.  I decided to drink Atkins shakes instead of MF, as soon as I use up what I have.  I was going to say I like them a lot better, but really, I dread them a lot less.  J  I feel ready to do this from now until vacation.   I ordered some shakes and the MF food I will need to finish it out.


I am practicing getting my mind set to not entertain doing anything differently than what I have planned.  I get one day a week off, which will usually be on a Saturday, unless something else comes up where I want to change the day.  I will feel so much better when I get to my vacation, in more ways than one, if I will do this.  My plan does include eating some raw veggies and fruit, if I need it.  I brought some fruit today, but so far am not struggling, so I think I will just eat it if I get too hungry or too tired of the MF food and that is causing me to struggle.  Sometimes a piece of fruit really helps with that.  I did end up eating a few grapes late afternoon.


My plan is to do carb cycling when I get back from vacation.  After talking about getting off sugar yesterday, my decision is to not “officially” get off until after vacation, but I won’t be eating much because I can eat it only on free days.  I won’t make that a big production – Stephanie is already not eating it, so I don’t want to do anything to trip her up.  I just don’t want to have to go through the mental thing I will need to, now, and then have to do it again after vacation.  Because I do plan to eat what I want to then (although the plan is to eat in moderation).  This is my first vacation since 1998, and I want to enjoy it.  There are different places we want to go that will involve eating dessert.


I’ve done fine today.  The only little temptation I have had is the candy bowl on my cubie’s ledge.  It had one piece of chocolate left in it (that’s all).  For some reason, that bothered me more than her having a whole bowl full.  “I’ll just eat this one and get it out of the way,” is usually the thought.  I knew better.  One is never enough and it opens up the door in your mind.  I finally took it and put it in someone else’s candy bowl that is further away and I don’t see it every time I walk by.  J


I've had a headache (as usual) today.  But I cannot use that as an excuse anymore.  If I wait to feel better to do this, it won't get done.

I want to get this posted before going home, because I never seem to get it done, otherwise.  I feel set in my mind and don’t think I will have much problem tonight.  For one thing, we don’t have much in the house to get in trouble with.  Often, even if we don’t have “convenient” things to get in trouble with, I can make pancakes or eat some oatmeal with sugar or cinnamon toast or something.  I am almost out of flour and sugar and am out of oatmeal.  I don’t have any bread or anything like that.  More than anything, though, I feel pretty strong in my mind tonight.

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Giving Myself a Talking-To

This is how my thoughts are going today.  I feel sad and tired and hopeless and ready to give up.  I don’t like my life right now.  Nothing circumstantially is that bad.  It just has to do with me, my body, my mind, etc.

My hopelessness comes from the fact that I don’t feel good.  My body hurts and my head hurts and I never want to go to work (or do much of anything else, for that matter).  But I know it is not something where taking a couple of days off because I don’t feel good is going to help.  This is my life, and if I don’t change something, this is how it is going to be.  Even then, I don’t know for sure that losing weight will help as much as I need it to, but making changes myself is my only hope.

The way I see it, here are my choices.

I can give up and substantially stop living; sit in my chair in front of the TV, doing only what I have to do to survive, for the rest of my life.  I have to go to work to have the means to live on, so I have to do that.  I have to have food to eat, so there are the tasks associated with that.  You get my drift.  This has been my life for the last year, for the most part.
  1. I can wait for God to “zap” me and magically make me feel better or wait for my mind and motivation to kick in and get back to working on things again.  Doesn’t seem to be happening.
  2. I can live in this perpetual “I’ll get started tomorrow mentality,” which is where I am right now.  I know things need to change and that is my only hope, but I have all kinds of excuses why today is not the day, so I put it off, once again, until tomorrow.
  3. I can realize that nothing is going to change until I change and I know I am going to have to do all these things eventually, even though it is not comfortable (to say the least), so I might as well get going now.
Here are my excuses of late.  (1) I have a headache – I’m going to wait until I get through this round of headaches and then I will get back to business.  (Still hasn’t happened.   Going on 3 weeks of a fairly constant headache.  It might not happen for weeks.)  (2) It’s an ice day and it’s cold and I just want comfort food.  I live in Texas, so thank goodness this doesn’t happen often, but it has been the temptation the last few days.  It’s a good thing I don’t live in the Northeast!  (3) I’m so sleepy.  (Being tired and sleepy makes me want to eat.)  (4) Danged candy bowl.  Why do people have to leave this stuff around to tempt me all the time?  I’ll just eat until this is gone.  (What happens when they fill it back up again?  One is never enough so one is always too many.)  (5) Someone brought bunuelos today.  I’ll just have that for breakfast instead of a MF shake.  Etc., etc.
 
I’ve got to think up responses to these excuses and put them into practice.  Bottom line is, I’m going to have to do what I keep putting off if things are ever going to change.  I might as well get going now.  I will feel better in so many ways.  (So why is it always so hard to get going?)
 
I had a bunuelo for breakfast.  That’s done.  But I can have a MF shake for lunch and just go on like that did not happen.  No more procrastinating.  I’m tired of hurting, I’m tired of feeling like life is never going to change.  I’m not magically going to wake up some morning feeling better, wanting to go to work, ready to get some exercise in whatever way I can do right now, etc.  I just have to do it anyway.  Sigh.
 
I also get lonely, off and on.  Steph is keeping herself pretty busy (good for her).  I need to get out and find my own friends, and I hope someday, a husband.  That would be nice.  I don’t mind being alone most of the time, but sometimes enough is enough.  And ultimately, I do want to marry again if I found the right guy.  But I certainly don’t want to settle for the wrong one.  No sir.
 
So it’s afternoon now and my pep talk did me some good.  I have stayed on track since the bunuelo this morning.  I have a plan for dinner, so I think I will be fine.  I WILL be fine.
 
One thing I have been procrastinating about is sending back some of the MF shakes and replacing them with something else.  I got that done today, so that is good.  I need to decide what I need to order to get me through to my trip on April 4.  If I’m going to do this, I need to do it and stop being wishy-washy.  And I do need the fast weight loss.  I’ve messed around the last 3 weeks and gone backwards and I am hurting again.  I had been feeling better.
 
Now, clean slate.  I am going to do this through April 3, with one day off a week.  And I need to make the decision about getting off sugar.  Either I am or I’m not.  But history tells me that’s what I need to do.

Thursday, February 19, 2015

Trying to Hold It Together

I'm trying to hang on here.  I do pretty good for a couple of days and then have a bad day.  Today has been pretty good.

I'm really struggling with the headaches and that makes me want to comfort myself with food.  I went to a concert with my boss and a coworker the other night and my coworker took a picture of me.  Yuck.  I looked at that picture when I was tempted today.  Here's how the day has gone.

I really wanted to get back on track today.  I had a couple of Atkins shakes left from sometime in the past and I decided I would use those instead of MF shakes, since I like them much better (don't like them, but they are much better than the MF ones).  I had one of those for breakfast and a MF snack bar for midmorning snack.  I now have 3 candy bowls close to me at work and I slipped up and had 2 chocolates from a candy bowl.  That's when I started using the picture for motivation.  So I had a shake for lunch, along with 2 cuties oranges.  I was struggling mid-afternoon, so went ahead and had my snack bar.  That candy bowl kept tempting me, but I managed to stay away from it.  By late afternoon I was pretty hungry.  I decided it would be better to have another MF snack bar than to give in, so did that.  I did not have anything ready to cook for dinner and didn't want to get home and mess up, so I stopped at Subway and got a sandwich and some baked chips.  I think that was much better than things I might have gotten into at home.  Since I had 2 snack bars this afternoon, no evening snack tonight.  I do plan to have a piece of fruit, if I need to.  So, not a perfect MF day, by any means, but much better.  I can lose weight on what I ate today (albeit slowly).  It always helps to get a positive day behind me.  I will see if I can do even better tomorrow.

I did not do a good job with grocery shopping this week.  I thought I had chicken left, but I guess I didn't.  I need to get some more.  I will look through my freezer and see if I've got other things for tomorrow.  I do not have a car available to go get anything tonight.  If I don't, I will pick up something at a restaurant downstairs tomorrow before they close after lunch.  I need to be prepared for success in my current state of motivation.

That's it for tonight.  Just trying to hold it together.

Sunday, February 15, 2015

Just Checking In

I've not been doing well the last few days.  Today I am getting back to it.  The biggest excuse I have is that I've had a non-stop headache.  It sure messes with my motivation sometimes.  But I am focusing on my goals again and trying to get back on track today.

I haven't had a perfect day, but it is good enough.  I had MF meals through the day, but my evening meal has been more Atkins-like than Medifast.  Still, much better than I had been doing.  Nothing tastes good tonight.  I just need to get through this day.

Just wanted to check in.  Good night all.

Monday, February 9, 2015

Smooth Day, Knock on Wood

I finished the evening last night without eating outside of plan.  In fact, I never had my last shake.  But I had eaten a few craisins earlier, so that probably evened out calorie-wise.  I know it sounds like I am falling off plan with the craisins a lot, and technically I am, but if that keeps me from having an all-out stumble, I am okay.  I am eating few enough calories that I still have a good weight loss.  Last time my carb cravings got pretty bad, the longer I was on Medifast.  This takes care of that craving a little bit.

I am having such a hard time facing the shakes at the end of the day that I decided to start my day with one today, instead.  That way my after-dinner snack is not something I dread.  I will have to rethink whether buying shakes in my second shipment is a good idea.  Or at least not 2 a day.  Yuck. I am thinking about using Atkins shakes instead of Medifast.  They taste so much better.  I will have to study nutritional content first.

I need to be careful to drink my water today, so that is a focus.  I will drink some down each time I go to the restroom until I have had enough.

I have now had my lunchtime shake, so I am done with the shakes for today.  Yay!  I also had some cuties oranges.  Sometimes you just need something to get that taste out of your mouth.  I don't really enjoy chocolate shakes that much anyway, even when done with the "bad stuff," but I have to chug th MF ones to get them down.

Later

I am home now and have had my dinner. I forgot to thaw anything out, so Stephanie picked us up some salads at Chick-Fil-A.  My, that tasted so good!  She remembered to get me grilled chicken this time.  I feel surprisingly satisfied.  I bit later I will have my MF pancake and if I need anything else, I will have some celery sticks.  Today has gone smoothly and I hope it finishes out that way.

I'm trying to get back to reading some blogs.  I hid from those, too, last year.  Which is silly because they probably would have helped.  I just wasn't there mentally after my hysterectomy.  I'm starting with Holly's blog.  It always inspired me a lot.

That's it for tonight.  I'm feeling pretty strong, so I think I will be fine (knock on wood).  Over and out.

Sunday, February 8, 2015

First Walk in a While

I probably overdid it a little yesterday in one way, but the scale was actually down this morning.  That was probably because with the different foods yesterday, it triggered some intestinal upset (to put it politely).  Whatever, I'll take it.

My pain levels continue to be improved.  I've been thinking about that.  I don't think the amount of weight I have lost can explain it all.  I was reading through my blog from last year and I talked about the all-over pain issue a little bit.  I suspect it has to do with eating less carbs.  Medifast is a lower- carb diet and I think eating a lot of carbs and sugar probably causes inflammation, which causes the all-over pain (probably fibromyalgia).  After I finish Medifast and get back from vacation, I should follow a lower-carb plan.  That seems to work better for me in other ways, too.

I have done  fine so far with my eating so far today.   I sleep later on the weekend, so I get started later.  I think that helps.  Maybe I should start eating later every day.   I had my MF Pancake after 10:00, then my MF snack bar a while later.  By 12:45 I was starting to growl.  I had been doing a bit of cleaning, etc. during the morning.  Cas was whining to go outside so I decided I was going to try walking him today.  So I did.  We had such a good time.  It is a warm day and I forgot how much I enjoyed getting outside and walking with him.  Doing it again reminded me that it was something I missed.  I did very well, pain-wise.  My knee bothered me a bit and I was starting to feel it in my hips a little on the way back, but no big pain.  It did tire me a bit (and Cas).  Cas has gotten a little plump since he hasn't been being walked.  This will be good for him too.  I need to do this every day I can and build up some stamina for my trip.   I am very encouraged with the improvement in my pain level.

I had my shake when I got back to the loft (at about 1:45).  I am following it with some celery sticks and dill pickle spears.   The bold taste of the dill pickle I think will help with my boredom issue.  I don't want to eat them too much, though, or the sodium will have an adverse effect.

As the afternoon went on, I begin to struggle in my mind.   My daughter was going to be gone for the evening and I begin to think about eating after she left.   By the time she did leave I was feeling a little stronger.  I could at least tell myself, "Just eat what you planned for dinner and see how you feel before eating anything else."  So that is what I am doing.  Dinner is some barbecue chicken breast and some roasted Brussels sprouts.  I think I am past the temptation, but I need to stay on my guard.

Yep, I think I got through the worst of it.  I finished out with some cuties oranges and feel good.  54 more days of this, minus 7 off-days.    Then, vacation!!

Saturday, February 7, 2015

Weigh-In Day

Well, my struggles this week have been worth it, I guess.  I am down to 284.6, a loss of 5.6 pounds.  It makes me so glad I did not give in the last two nights.  They were pretty difficult.  More later.

Friday, February 6, 2015

Hoping 90% is Enough

Thursday

Well, I did end up having a stumble last night.  I just did not want a shake.  I should have had one at work.  When I got home, I decided I was going to have a 100-calorie container of yogurt and some frozen cherries instead of a shake, which I did.  I had worked until 8:30 p.m. and for some reason, I keep slipping into withdrawal before time to take my medicine again, so I was dealing with that.  I had me a big bowl of oatmeal.  Could have been much worse, of course, but I attribute the stumble to those things.  Next time, I need to drink that shake down before I leave.  Although, really, I think it was the working late (again) and withdrawal that caused it more than anything.

Back to it today.  Actually, I am already at work and have not had breakfast yet.  My boss called early this morning and asked me to get to work early.  So I had to hurry things up and get to the office.  I decided I would have a shake for breakfast and my usual MF pancake for after-dinner snack this time, since those fit my time constraints better.  I haven’t had time to drink the shake yet, but will.

I certainly thought things would slow down a bit since our case is not going to trial, but there has been extra work getting final papers done.  Hopefully it will settle down after this week.  I certainly don’t mind staying late sometimes, but this every night thing gets old.  I always like it when I get my paycheck, though.  It's just tough because I am always hungry by the time I go home.

I got on the scale this morning and had only done a little damage.  I can’t let one stumble affect my day going forward.

Friday

That’s as far as I got yesterday.  It was a busy day.

Yesterday went down like this:  I was really busy for a while after getting here in the morning, so I had my snack bar first.  After 11:00, I was getting really hungry, so I had a shake.  I waited maybe an hour longer and a shake was not enough to take care of the hunger that built up, so I drank my lunch shake and had some raw veggies.  That made it settle down, finally.  Then, late afternoon, I had a snack bar.

I actually almost did the same thing last night as the night before.  I didn’t work late, but I went home and had my L&G meal.  As the night went on after that, I kept thinking about wanting something else and actually got to the point where I was planning to after my daughter went to bed.  She kept staying up, and by the time she did go, I fought with myself a little and thought, “Oh well, I will just go to bed.”  So I did.  I totally forgot that I could have had a MF pancake for my evening snack.  I was still munchy after dinner and ate a few craisins.  I never did have the pancake.  But I never had the oatmeal either, so that was good.  Hopefully today will be a more normal day.  Tomorrow is weigh-in, so that is good motivation.

I have not been drinking enough water this week.  I need to do better at that.

I still seem to be trying to slip into withdrawal easily.  That was part of my problem last night.  I hope that lets up soon.

Later

I keep floundering in my mind.  I have not acted upon it, but I keep having thoughts of eating outside of plan.  I gave myself a pep talk – I can do this! – and I think I am okay now.  I am glad tomorrow is my off-day.  It’s not that I want to go out and eat a lot.  It’s just that I want something different than these MF foods.  That gets really old.  But I do like the result, so I have no plans of quitting before my vacation.  Certainly not before I use up the food I bought.

Still Later

It's almost bedtime.  I've struggled all evening but the only thing I have given in to is a few craisins.  It's partly this danged withdrawal.  I makes me munchy and I'm already kind of hungry all the time.  I think I've done pretty well, all things considered.  I don't know why it makes you want to eat all the time, but it does.

I did better on my water today.  I probably should drink down some more before going to bed.

We'll see how weigh-in goes tomorrow.  I have definitely stayed on track 90% of the time.

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Trip Planning


Obviously I updated this throughout the day:

So far, so good today.  I had my breakfast of a MF pancake.  I was having some feelings of weakness, so I added just a few craisins to the batter.  I also had a couple of bites of banana (didn’t want any more).  That seemed to help.  I was fine until snack, which was a MF snack bar, at about 10:45 a.m.  I think it is better to have a little deviance like that when I am feeling that way, rather than letting it build to a stumble later.

 

I totally forgot that we are having a firm luncheon today.  The menu is barbecue and fixings.  I guess this will be my “L&G” meal.  I plan to eat reasonably (there will be grilled chicken among the meats), but it will be more calories than a regular L&G meal.  I think that sometimes you have to go with the flow with these things and know that if 90% of the time, you are sticking to your plan, you will get where you want to go.  But I do not plan to eat enough to undo any weight loss for the day or week.

 

Speaking of which, right now, I seem to be losing about a pound a day.  I know that will not continue, but it is nice for the purposes of this time period.

 

Well, lunch is done and here is the damage:  I had a few dill pickle slices, some grilled chicken (maybe 2 oz., but no more) and some lean brisket (maybe 2 oz., but no more), a spoonful of pinto beans, and a bite of potato salad.  Of course, I put a little barbecue sauce on the meat.  Not too bad, considering what was out there, including peach cobbler and rolls.  That means MF meals the rest of the day, joy, joy.

Later

I am working late again.  I don't know why attorneys send requested changes to documents at 5:00 in the afternoon.  Of course my guys are going to go over them and reply before I can leave.

I had my afternoon snack, a MF snack bar.  Dinner will be a shake.  I don't know if I will have it here at work or when I get home.  It depends on how hungry I get.  Right now I'm doing okay.  I will finish out the day with the MF salty snack I bought.  I can't handle another shake -- 2 in a row.

Considering the obstacles thrown at me, I think I had a good day.

I've spent cracks of time on planning my New York trip -- planning what we will do on what day based on grouping things together that are in close proximity to each other.  Going through and looking at restaurants we want to go to might be a little dangerous, but so far I am handling it okay.  It is really starting to get real to me that I am going on this trip.  I can't wait!!!!!

I'm going to get this posted so I don't forget.  Good night all.

Tuesday's Post


Tuesday

So far, so good today.  My hunger has been manageable.  I have to say, when it comes time to drinking a MF shake, I have to be mighty hungry before I’m ready to do that.  But I wasn’t tempted to do anything else – just put it off as long as I could, lol.

 

Not much to report today.  I have to not think about how much longer I am planning to do this; I just take it as it comes.  I look forward to evenings when I can have something besides MF foods, and beyond that, to my off-days.  Thank goodness for those.  But I really don’t give it much thought.

 

I have to be careful right now that I take my medicine on time or I slip into withdrawal really easily.  However, I haven’t had to take any of the stronger med to deal with withdrawal.  My current med seems to take care of it if I take it on time.  The first symptom of withdrawal I notice, sometimes, is I start sneezing.  I thought this was strange, but googled it and it is pretty normal.  Also, I started getting that restless legs feeling.  I have an alarm set to remind me to take my medicine, so I try to stick to that.

 

I am hoping my recent headaches have been from all the time working at my desk.  I say that.  I was thinking that was probably it, and I have not been taking lunches, so that is a lot of hours at my desk with no break.  Since our case settled, I am trying to at least take a short lunch so I get away from my desk and allow that tightness that starts building to dissipate a little bit.  Now I just hope that works.  I have a headache, but it is fairly mild.  Just a nagging thing I would rather not have to deal with.

 

This afternoon, my daughter is off to the ER with severe stomach pain.  If you have not read my archives, she has a history of intestinal obstructions.  She doesn’t think that is what it is because it doesn’t feel like it is in the usual place.  But pain has been building since last night.  Ugh.  The update is that they did not find anything wrong.  That doesn’t always mean anything, but that’s where it stands right now.

 

I’m having to work a little late, so I’m going to have my evening shake now and my L&G dinner when I get home.  Hopefully that will work and I don’t have to end up staying REALLY late.

 

I went home at around 7:45.  I had made my protein last night, so I just had to warm it up, but I had to fix my veggie.  Dinner was a boneless/skinless chicken breast with some barbecue sauce and some green beans.  It tasted okay, but I kind of had to push it down at the last.  My appetite is so strange these days.  I was really hungry, but sometimes things make me nauseous.  I don’t know why.  Along about 8:30 or 9:00 I realized I was feeling some pretty significant withdrawal symptoms.  It wasn’t time to take my medicine yet, so I guess I wasn’t quite through with the old med yet.  I took a third of a pill and took a hot bath and it settled down after that.  However, I got a little munchy and ate a few craisins.  Not enough to do any harm.

 

I’m going to get this posted and put today on a different post.

Monday, February 2, 2015

Right Back To It

The scale showed possibly a .2-pound (that’s point two, not 2 pounds) “gain” after yesterday.  I am very good with that.  I won’t be spending my whole week making up for it.  I am back to it today.

I read my blog in a couple of spots most of the weekend.  First I wanted to read when I was on Medifast last time.  Man, I was kickin’ it pretty good at that time.  I didn’t remember how much I was trying to exercise too during that time.  Of course, now I remember that was why I did Medifast in the first place.  I wanted to get some weight off quickly so my pain levels improved enough to where I could get exercise.  Looks like I accomplished that pretty well.

The second spot I read in my blog is the time leading up to my back surgery.  What was I doing that may have brought it on when it did?  Was I heavier at that time, etc.?  I probably need to go a little further back than I did to see when the pain started getting worse, but I got to my lightest weight yet at the time my back was getting the worst.  So I guess that shows it is not all weight that was my problem.  Now that I have had that decompression surgery, if I can get my weight back down again, I am interested to see how much better I will feel.  I know I felt so much better after surgery.  Then I had a full hysterectomy less than two weeks later and my emotions got all wompy, and I just could not pull it together, so gained all the weight.  Do I regret that?  Of course.  But it does no good to kick myself for it.  I just have to take things as they are and go from here.

One thing I did right before it got really bad is we moved and I did a lot of lifting.  I remember now that it was getting worse before that.  But I think the move pushed me over the edge.  Note to self:  next time I move, pay someone to do it for me.  I’ve never had the luxury of doing that, but I have the financial ability to do that now, if I planned ahead.

 I do fancy I feel some better, even after just 10-12 pounds lost.  That’s good!  It remains to be seen whether it is just a coincidence or if the weight-loss is really doing that much good.  I was a little surprised to be feeling this much better after only 10-12 pounds lost.

Early in 2014, before back surgery, I had a post or two about how your words are important and inner healing, etc.  It’s funny, but that is the part I struggled with so much after the hysterectomy.  I know my hormones were out of whack, but I would like to get to the place where I do not revert back to being so self-critical.  I was very unforgiving of myself during that time, which was a lot of the problem.  Looking back, I know I had to be extremely hormonal because I wasn’t nearly so self-critical before I started last week.  I know that I did not take enough time off after those two surgeries.  I did not give myself time to heal.  Physically I felt okay, but that didn’t mean I was ready to go back to work that soon.  I just felt so pressured for some reason.  Next time, I need to stand up for me more.  Hopefully there isn’t a next time, but real life says there probably will be.  Also, my daughter got married the weekend after I went back to work, so we were trying to get a wedding done in the midst of my recovery.  That’s a lot of pressure for anyone.  But I could not have enjoyed the wedding if I did not have the surgery when I did.

I am glad that in my blog during the time I was on Medifast I was pretty detailed about what I ate.  It helped when buying groceries yesterday and helps me know what I can eat and be successful.

This morning, before breakfast, I had a couple of celery sticks after taking my medication.  I was hungry and I needed something in my tummy, but I didn’t want to eat breakfast that early.  I woke up with some minor withdrawal symptoms and couldn’t go back to sleep, but it seems my current medication took care of it.  For breakfast I had a MF pancake with a little sugar-free jelly.  Later I had a couple of baby carrots.  I drank down a little more than a bottle of water (probably about 20 oz.) before leaving for work.  That is one thing I am focusing on today.  On my last bathroom break, I stopped and drank down two 12-ounce cups of water.  I will keep doing that until I have met “my quota.”  That seems to work for me pretty well.  One thing I am not giving up yet is drinking a SF Monster every day.  My medication makes me sleepy.  Plus, I enjoy them and I don’t have much to make my taste buds happy during the day on Medifast.  I will do with this habit after I move on from MF.  However, on my old medication (which made me soooooo sleepy all the time), I was drinking two Monsters a day.  I am cutting it down to one.

Mid-morning I had a MF snack bar.  So far I haven’t needed any raw veggies to stave off hunger this morning.  Lunch will be a MF shake.  I will probably eat a few raw veggies and an apple at some point this afternoon.  Then, late afternoon I will have another MF snack bar.

Later

My hunger is staying much more satisfied today.  That lets me know a lot of the issue last week was the withdrawal problem.  However, even yesterday on my off-day, I would eat what should have filled me up, but I still felt a little hollow.  Maybe I just needed to get used to eating less.

I started getting hungry after that and then realized it was almost 3:00.  Not too long until I can have an afternoon snack.  Definitely better this week.  Then I got busy with my boss and it was 4:30 before I had my afternoon snack.  That was good, since I'm not as hungry when I get home as if I have it earlier.

Evening

It's bedtime, so I want to finish this up and get to bed.  I finished out on track.  I had a small flat iron steak and some green beans (fresh) with a few slivered almonds sprinkled on them for dinner.  Those seemed like the best green beans I ever tasted.  I had a piece of fruit to finish it out, since I never did have one earlier in the day.  My evening snack was a MF shake.

Before having my shake, I was having to talk myself out of eating "just a little something" or eating yogurt instead of my MF food, but I drank the shake down, it took care of any hunger and I was fine.  But I sure don't like 'em.  They do fill you up pretty good, though, and I ordered enough for two a day, so need to do that for everything to come out like it should on my order.

Going to bed now.  Over and out.

Sunday, February 1, 2015

Off-Day/Super Bowl Party

I finished strong yesterday.  I stayed up late -- until Midnight.  I was really hungry by then. I had thoughts of going ahead and eating a little something since it was already tomorrow, or drinking some hot chocolate, but I didn't.  I went on to bed.  I had a little trouble sleeping because of restless legs at one point.  Withdrawal symptom.   But I had already taken about 1/3 of a pill of the stronger med earlier and it didn't last long, so I did okay.

I decided on an off-day today, as opposed to an off-meal.  However, that is not a license to eat everything I can think of.

Breakfast is some oatmeal.  However, not one of the huge bowls of oatmeal I was eating before I started.  I actually measured it this time -- 1/2 cup dry.  I ate it slowly and waited a little bit, but still felt a little hungry, so I made a scrambled egg.  I can't remember the last time I made one scrambled egg. I always eat two.

I woke up with a lot of pain today.  I don't know why because it had been improved the last couple of days.  It is cold and rainy -- don't know if that has anything to do with it or not.

Later

I'm home after being gone most of the rest of the day.  My daughter and I ate lunch at Chipotle, where I had two tacos with soft corn tortillas.  These tacos are fairly low calorie (something I used to eat when doing WW).  I did have a few chips with some guacamole.

After that we went to get groceries, brought them home and put them away and then went to where my daughter is house/puppy sitting (which is my cousin's house) and watched a little TV before I went over my married daughter's home for a Super Bowl party.  I think I ate pretty reasonably there.  I had just a few chips with hot sauce and guacamole.  Then I had some chicken, roasted potatoes, Brussels sprouts and a roll.  Dessert was a small serving of apple cobbler and a small serving of this brownie thing (added up to the size of one dessert).  That was it.  I never got extremely full, and I felt like I had a good day.  I don't feel like I ate so much I will have to spend all week making up for it.

My pain improved through the day, so that was good.  It has actually been better the last 2-3 days.  I guess losing 10 pounds has helped a little.

Now, I should get off to bed.  I typically don't like to do things on Sunday night because my work weeks can be so long, but it was fun tonight, so I am good.

Have a good week!