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Tuesday, November 19, 2013


Things feel a little rough this morning.  I know it is all part of the transition and getting settled.  The loft is turned upside down with clutter.  Hopefully we can get things put to right quickly.  We also had to deal with the two dogs last night.  Stephanie has left to drive to Albuquerque to take Junior to his new home.  Tucker is much more manageable.  I am not sure if our plans for Tucker are going to work out.  We may have him here for a couple of months until Tom gets his own apartment, leading up to the wedding.  Then Tom will have him there with him.  But Tucker is older and well-behaved.  If we can get him and the cat to get along, we can make that work (although I would prefer not to).  We are living in close quarters and having a big dog around makes it feel even closer; but thankfully, I am easy-going and I can live with it if I have to, as long as I am not having to do any of the work to take care of him.  Tucker is also well house-trained, so I don't have to worry about that.  He is crated during the day, so the cat can come out and they can get more used to each other.  Hopefully.

One thing I do have more control over is my room and bathroom.  I can at least keep that in good order right now and have that haven in the chaos.  It will take a little longer to get things in order everywhere else because more stuff has to be taken to storage and Tom is out of town on a job.  We can take some stuff in my SUV, but most will have to be taken in his pickup.

Today is our Thanksgiving luncheon at work.  I was supposed to do some cooking last night, but it just could not happen.  Too much stuff sitting around.  I may try to whip up some roast Brussels sprouts with bacon.  My plan was to contribute something Atkins friendly.  Better get going.


My pain levels are way up and much more persistent than usual today.  It is wearing me out.  Again, I feel like one big ball of pain.  I have a doctor's appointment Thursday and will talk to her about it.  The thing is, not much can be done that is not already being done.  Injections never seemed to do much good.  I have to find a way to keep going and get more weight off to see if I feel better, or get to where I can do something about it surgically, if it comes to that.  NO CHOICE (that's what I tell myself about getting the weight off).

My Brussels sprouts were a hit.  I did pretty well in my choices at lunch, to a point.  There was plenty to choose from that was low carb and I did well with that.  But then I had dessert.  I don't need to eat anything else today if I am going to somewhat salvage the day.  I may have some dessert on Thanksgiving, but I need to put together the rest of the days until then in such a way that my weight will respond.  I need to eat less than usual.  I don't want to keep wasting time.  I can do this.  I must get focused.  And I must get moving.

One thing I am having trouble with pain-wise is my tailbone area.  I have had a strange tailbone since birth.  Riding the recumbent bike seems to exacerbate the problem.  I need to get a donut pillow or something to use when I am riding and see if that will help.  I cannot do the treadmill right now.  I don't think I can get in the pool because of my feet.  I might be able to do the rowing machine -- I still haven't tried that.  I also might be able to do the elliptical.  At least it wouldn't be impact on my feet and joints.  I have to find a way to keep moving, even if it hurts somewhat.  If I do end up getting injections in my feet, I would like to wait until after the first of the year.  I would like everything to count against that deductible, in case I end up having surgery next year.

I have been doing some more reading on spondylolisthesis -- particularly, comments from people who have had surgery to repair it to try to determine how successful the surgery is.  It is a very interesting feeling to read people's descriptions of what they went through and to recognize those exact symptoms in yourself.  When people described the worsening of their symptoms, it sounded all too familiar.  Interestingly, some people said their symptoms were worse when they were thinner.  It's too hard to describe why, and I certainly don't know if that would be the case for me, but it was interesting.  However, I have to lose some weight just to get to where I could have the surgery -- or at least the best surgery option that would not have some of the negative side effects that the alternative would have.  The best option is a 360 fusion, which means they go in through your abdomen to do most of the work, and then through the back for some final work.  You can have a fusion just going through the back, but it requires them to "damage" a lot of the muscles in your back in order to get to your spine.  Going through the front does not do that.  It is definitely the better option.  My daughter had a 360 fusion for a different back issue (that resulted from a bad car accident).  She has some moderate back pain occasionally, but is doing infinitely better than before she had the surgery.

The thing is, most of the people (whose comments I read) who had symptoms as significant as mine did not get better through more conservative treatments.  I could get to the point to where my spine is leaning on my spinal cord, which could lead to paralysis.  I am giving myself about 35 pounds to see if I feel better.  While I am getting that weight off, I am going to work on strengthening my core, stretching, and doing all I know to do to get better through conservative treatment.  If I do not, I am seriously going to consider having the surgery.  In the meantime, I am going to prepare financially in the event I need to have the surgery.

Another thing described in these comments is that most felt worse when they did not move enough, which is certainly true for me.  I need to push through and get to working out again, and I will likely feel some better.  I am planning to start up with yoga again next week (my class).  I am going to do some at home as soon as I have enough room in my living area to do the routine illustrated on the two videos I have.  Then, as I get stronger and more confident with that, I will start going to one or both of the morning yoga classes at my gym to get stronger and "looser."

Almost of the people who left comment saying they did have surgery for spondy said it definitely helped them and they were glad they did it.  It just daunting to think about being off work for several weeks.  We will see what happens.


  1. Wow, I don't stop by for a few day and LOTS happening in your world! Wow, both girls moving in? I hope they keep up their end of the bargain and take care of things around the house since you pay the bills.

    Just remember - keep your chin up - and eating food won't change the stress that's going on in your life. Hugs!

    1. Thanks Biz! Had a good eating day today -- happy about that.


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