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Friday, November 1, 2013

Just Stuff

I'm telling you, my mind argues with me about working out every morning.  But I did it.  I didn't entertain the thoughts much today.  I put them aside and thought, Just do it.  I hope I will get to the point soon where there isn't such a battle every day.  I need to make it like I deal with not eating sugar -- in my mind, it is not a choice, so I don't even consider it.  I only worked out four days this week, but I got the same minutes as five days of what I have been doing.

I've talked about how in 2009 and the first half of 2010, I had become a workout machine.  I went to the gym almost every morning before work, and many days got two workouts done, and some days got three workouts done.  I was walking to work this morning thinking I will be glad when I get that trim again.  Then I remembered, I actually weigh less now than I got to then.  It's just my level of fitness that is not up with how I was then.  I am the trimmest I have been since 2002, and that was only for a relatively short time.  That's when my husband started going really nuts and making all kinds of accusations.  Hmmm, think there is any correlation to those two things?  Probably.  He harped on me year after year about losing weight and being ashamed of me, and then when I was getting there, he accused me of having affairs with every man I could find.  Go figure.  Of course, I gained it all back and more.

But, all that negative is gone from my life, thank the Lord.

I did 40 minutes on the recumbent bike, same as the last two days.  My legs felt quite tired this morning -- particularly the inside of my thighs -- so I did not turn my toes inward this time, to give them a little break.  My arms were tired too, but I still did my arm work.  They will get a rest this weekend.  I need to do another ab workout tonight and tomorrow or Sunday.  But that only takes a few minutes.

Breakfast was a 2-egg omelet with bacon.  Unless I get hungrier today, I plan to get another small salad for lunch.

I am not loving the outfit I wore today.  It's kind of casual Friday, but I don't feel good in this outfit.  I don't know if I will wear these pants again.  They are khakis and very wide-legged.  You have to pair them with the right thing, and I think they look best with flats, but flats make my plantar fasciitis worse.  The shirt I would like better with a jacket over.  Oh well.

I did get hungry in the afternoon, but it was getting close enough to quitting time that I hoped I would be okay until I got home.  However, I was pretty hungry, so I went downstairs and got some nuts.  When I got home, I wasn't that hungry, and I am getting low on groceries, so I ate the rest of the sugar free ice cream I made and that was it.  I guess that's not the healthiest eating today, but I hope it will have a good effect on my weigh-in, since I didn't eat as much today.

I got off at 5:30 and was home by 5:35 today.  I wasn't sure how to act!  However, every time I sit down and get still, I get sleepy.  I fell asleep watching a movie.

Tomorrow we are having brunch with some family at The Porch (restaurant).  Then we are going to look for bridesmaids dresses.  I also need to buy groceries.  I need to not expend too much energy, because I want to go to class and church Sunday.  There is just not enough time to do all I need to do.  Actually, I didn't work that much this week, but I guess I was catching up.  I need to do more in the evening.  Hopefully things will get on a more even keel for a while and I can get my schedule more as it should be.

Now that I have done 40-minute workouts three times this week, I probably should bump them up every day.  We'll see.  I really want to get to going to the gym at least some mornings.  I'm just not sure if I want to walk there that early in the morning (because it is quite dark and there are a lot of homeless people around downtown) and my son has my car right now.  I will have to get up earlier if I do that.  And prepare things ahead of time, like breakfast and food to take to work.

Here's hoping for a good loss tomorrow, but I will be very surprised if I get to 245.

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