The scale is moving. I hope I at least get to or pass 255 at my weigh-in Saturday morning. 255 would be 3 pounds.
I plan to pull out the bins in the top of my closet this weekend and see what I am able to get into soon, plus get the dress out that I am aiming for by Easter and see how far I have to go for it.
I am getting a lot of “skinny” comments around work. Skinny being a relative term, of course. But people are noticing.
I got to go to lunch today (Jerry has standing meetings on Thursdays), so that is good for Cas and good for me to get more activity. I was feeling pretty empty, so ate a few baby carrots before heading out to walk him. When I got back to my loft, I did a little of this and that and was about to walk out the door when I realized, I forgot to eat lunch! Lol. So I mixed up my shake right quick and drank it down.
I have a new discomfort the last couple of days – a catching feeling in my right hip. I had this before the back problems got worse, so maybe I am backing my way out of the symptoms. Lol. After I walk a bit, it eases up. It’s just uncomfortable for the first 25 steps or so. Not extreme pain, just uncomfortable.
I’m going to have to have a heart-to-heart with my son. Confrontation – something I am not good with. But it is for his own good. I think I know how to say it in a way that will convey it is because I care about him and not like his father used to do it. Which is one reason I have been bad about it. His father alienated him so much in his younger days (they have no relationship now), that I don’t want to do anything to push him away like that. But I have a proven relationship and track record with him and he knows I am nothing like his father. So this is something I must do.
I really have to work on my assertiveness. Something I am having to do at work today should give me practice at that. My boss has tasked me with talking to the client in a little bitty case we have and getting the case settled. So I must be authoritative and tell him why he needs to fork out more money to settle it than his last offer. I sometimes find it easier when I am assuming a different role. So I psych myself to act like an attorney and it is easier. It is more difficult for me when it is personal. I think it goes back to the old mentality that I better not make any waves so people won’t mind having me around too much – a feeling I have had since birth. This is something I need to overcome, deep down, once and for all, if I am going to be successful in changing my life for the better. So there is no time like the present to work on it.
I think I mentioned yesterday that I realize it is going to take another week (after next week) of Medifast to get to my preliminary goal. I was thinking that I may have to take a week off before doing the third week because I have been feeling so weak. There are a couple of reasons I do not want to do this. First is I want to get this done before Easter, not only so I can be comfortable in the dress I want to wear, but also because I want to have my hair done by then, which is my reward for reaching that preliminary goal. The second reason is I just want to get done with Medifast once and for all and move on to WW. I don’t want to put that off any longer than I have to. So I am thinking, if I am still feeling weak at the end of next week, the following week I will do a modified version of Medifast. My thoughts on that right now are to do the 5 Medifast meals as usual, but on my Lean & Green meal, add a carbohydrate such as a piece of bread, a small baked potato, a serving of pasta, possibly with an extra teaspoon of fat, or something like that. Maybe that extra bit of carbs would give me the extra strength I need without prohibiting the amount of weight loss I need to finish the goal. We will see. I don’t know if the carbs is what would help, or more protein. I guess if the carbs didn’t help after a day or two, I could have something like a container of Greek yogurt in the morning and see if that made a difference. I just want to get done and move on to my long-term plan. But I do not want to quit Medifast until I have reached my preliminary goal. It’s part of the not quitting thing I am working on.
There are times today when I start realizing I am hungry and I think I am going to have to eat some carrots or something, but then will realize it is time for one of my MF meals. I guess that is good. But I typically start getting the most hunger in the evening.
Today was one of those days at work that was pleasantly busy, so I felt productive, but not crazy busy where it is push, push, push all day. I don’t mind those days every once in a while, but days like today are nice.
I took some dinner to work, just in case I had to work late. I was feeling okay at 6:00 and decided to wait until I got home. I ended up not getting off until 7:45, but I did okay. I just warmed up my dinner when I got home. I wasn’t nearly as hungry today. Now if the weight will respond well!