I have been kind of down lately because of my lack of friends. I don’t blame anyone for this. I have always been too much of a loner and I work so much, it is no wonder. But I decided I had to change things. I wanted to start being proactive about building relationships. If you want to have friends, you have to BE a friend.
One thing I decided is that I was going to do birthday cards this year. Everyone likes to at least be remembered on their special day. So I calendared all the family birthdays I knew of, and everyone at work. For family, not only am I going to send a card, but a small gift ($10 gift card, etc.). Just little indications that I want to be a part of their lives. I decided this last night. The first birthday of the year is in 2 days, so he may get his card a day or so late, but I have the card and am getting a $10 iTunes gift card to go in it.
The second thing I did was invite two friends (one from work and one a former co-worker) to go to a movie tomorrow night. We are going to have dinner first and then go see The Hobbit (in 3D). I’m looking forward to it!
Another thing I have done is have a talk with my kids. I did a lot of it in writing, but we are talking now after I got it all down. I need them to work on independence and stability so they don’t need my help so much. I told them my own needs too. My son got another job (long story, but the one he got before the end of the year did not work out). I am also talking to him about long-term plans. He needs a career, not just a job. He is considering a couple of alternatives and I feel better already. It’s not just the financial issues, but I worry about him.
Stephanie is looking into filing a claim against her doctor/hospital for the second intestinal obstruction. More than one doctor have told her it should have been fixed the first time and she lost her job because of having to be out so much after the second one happened. She has not been able to find another office job yet and she is just not holding up very well with her nannying job (she also cleans their home). It is pretty hard on her physically, and with all her foot and knee surgeries, a back surgery, etc., she is just not going to be able to do that long-term. Plus they have cut her back to part-time and she is not making enough money, so I am still having to help her. She is looking for an office job, but so far, hasn’t found one.
It just feels better that we are being proactive about these things.
Something I have decided to do is save as much money as I can toward a really good vacation, possibly a trip with my sisters to NYC. I have never been anywhere like this (only pretty close to home) and I would love to do something different. All of the money my boss gives me on the side will go into this fund, and as soon as my kids are stabilized, all my OT money over what I have already budgeted is going into that fund. Hopefully that will happen fairly soon. And if Stephanie gets something from her claim soon enough, perhaps I can be paid back for the things I have been paying and I can put the money into that fund.
Another thing I did this week is I went back to church last Sunday. I never intended not to get back to church (and certainly didn’t plan not to for a whole year), but things just kept happening. I work so much and my son has been borrowing my car, my daughters changed to another church I was not interested in going to (too far away), so I couldn't ride with them, etc., etc. My daughters have decided to go back where we were going and I couldn’t find anyplace I would rather go, so I am back. I don’t have to go to the same church as they do, but I never got around to making a decision to do anything else. 2012 was a rough year. I need to get involved in some smaller groups as I can. It is too big a church to get to know people just by going to service. So I will need to choose a class or two to get involved in. That is the main reason I had given thought to going somewhere else, but I like most everything else about my church.
I also told my son I needed to transition back to my car being mine and him borrowing it instead of my feeling like I had to ask to use my own car.
All this doesn’t have a lot to do with diet and exercise, but all of this was baggage that was weighing me down and/or impeding progress. So I think it was a good week! What do you think?
I may try to go to a WW meeting soon. I think it would help. But I also still might do a couple of months of Medifast. Pain issues are still getting in the way, way too much.
Most of what I am doing now is no sweets and a higher protein/lower carbohydrate diet. My quantity has been under much better control this week, too.
All in all, I am feeling more optimistic.