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Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Checking In

Thought I had better check in.  I actually feel a little better today.  Not quite so overwhelmed and out of control.

I got a whole weekend off, and rested for most of it.  Although I have been having to work late every night this week, I have made sure to take a lunch hour, eat a real lunch and walk my dog.  My daughters have helped me out a little with my dog.

I am having to pay a lot of Stephanie’s bills, but I have “required” her to start cleaning my apartment and do other stuff to “earn” the money for the help she is getting.  It is not enough to cover all that I am paying, but I don’t think I should be doing it and not requiring anything of her.  I need to move them all to independence as quickly as possible.  I work all the time and don’t even get to enjoy the extra money, at the very least.

I am starting to push Stephanie to get out and look for a different job.  She was recovering from knee surgery, so gave that a little time, but now it is time to start the hunt.  I told her today I wanted to stop being “Mom’s National Bank” as soon as possible.  We decided what bills she had to pay, how much she needed, I give her what she needs above what she is making and she has to make that work.  No more pretending like Mom’s money is her money, which it often feels like.

I have been eating a little better this week.  Not as well as I need to, but not so out of control as it has been.  I need to get back to tracking food and counting my points.  I will make it a goal to start that Monday, if not before.  I have to start taking my life back.

That’s really all for today.  Just trying to stay in the game, even if I am on the bench for now.

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