Search This Blog

Friday, September 21, 2012

Yay for Friday!

Okay, my sister tells me she is looking for updates on my blogs and then they aren’t there.  As you can guess, that is because I am not doing great.

I did better yesterday.  The day before, I don’t know what happened.  Just lost it.  When I do that, I get down.  So I ask myself why I do it.  I don’t know, but reminding myself that it will make me down does help a little.

I am doing a lot of walking.  That is good.  I will keep that up and I am looking for routes and ways to increase it.  It kills two birds with one stone (helps with my dog and gets me my exercise).  I walk what I feel like is a pretty long distance, and when I get back to the apartment, it only took 30 minutes.  So I will keep increasing as I can.  It helps when I choose a destination.  I am going to walk to the dog park on Saturday.  I am not sure of the safety of the route in the evening, so will walk it on Saturday the first time.

There is a lot of stress related to my daughter.  I don’t want to go into it all here.  Just looking for some answers to her being sick and hurt all the time.

I am starting to feel the desire to date again, but at the same time, a little fearful about it.  If I knew I could go out and find a great guy without having to weed through the not-so-great ones, I would do it.  Plus I want to get to feeling better.  When I was dating two or three years ago, I was a little surprised at how easy it was to get dates.  But I got my heart broken a little bit and I don’t want to do that again.  I want to do some things differently this time.

What are my goals, generally, for the next few months?  Generally, less pain, lose weight (of course), make friends and begin having a life outside of work and the kids.  I want to keep those goals in front of me.  Otherwise you get into the day-to-day things of life and never make any changes.

I need to be finding ways to meet new people.  As soon as I get my car back, I am going to make a decision about what church to go to and start going back to church.  I likely will go back to the one I was attending.  I had no “problem” with the church, other than it was big and a little harder to get to know people that way.  But the message and the services and the outreach of the church, I am in wholehearted agreement with.  The only other “problem” with it is that I will probably never be able to get really involved with the music there, other than sing in the choir.  I don’t know that that’s true, but every other church I have attended, I have been on the worship team, done solos, etc., and I do not think that will happen much at this one.  I don’t really care right now.  But I might at some point.  You have to understand, I am good enough to where I was chosen to sing in the Dallas Symphony Chorus.  But for some reason, I never felt like I would ever be used much musically at this church.  It just never did click.  I don’t want to be some prima donna – that’s not what singing in the church is about.  But music is part of who I am and how a lot of things are expressed in me, and when I cannot express it in my spiritual home, it bothers me a little.  I have been too busy just making a living the last few years to care, but someday I might like to again.  But I digress.

They had a happy hour at our loft community last night, but I did not go.  I don’t know why – probably because a happy hour is not really my kind of thing.  It’s not just that I don’t really drink.  But walking in by myself and trying to meet people in that setting would not be easy for me.  There is a movie matinee Sunday that I am going to try to go to.  (This loft community has its own small movie theater.)  Maybe I will meet some friends there that might lead to other activities.  I would love to find a group that liked to play board games and stuff.  I have heard that some people get together on the patio and do that.  Maybe I could be the “instigator.”  I have always been the type to sit back and wait to be asked.  But there is no reason I have to do that.  There is no reason I cannot ask.

I am doing okay on my eating so far today.  Just need to hold it together this evening.  I am so glad it is Friday!!!

No comments:

Post a Comment

I welcome your comments and read every one! However, if you are trying to sell me or my readers something, your comment will be deleted posthaste. Thanks for reading my blog and I hope you receive encouragement from it. --Sheryl