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Monday, September 10, 2012

Trying to Get Going

I hope today will be a little quieter day than any I had last week.  We were preparing for big depositions in our big case.  My boss and his associate are now gone for the depositions in a distant city, so perhaps I have a chance to catch my breath this week.  Knowing my boss, however, there will be plenty of phone calls and work sent to me to deal with.  My desk is a disaster area, and hopefully I can deal with that this week.

I had a very rough night.  I left my pain meds at work Saturday, and although I could have walked down to the office to get it yesterday, the amount of pain I was in didn’t seem to warrant that extra effort.  I forgot, however, about withdrawal.  By last night, I had not had any for over 24 hours and withdrawal was starting to kick in.  I slept only an hour or two last night.

If you didn’t gather it from the above, I worked all day Saturday until 7:00.  So yesterday, I didn’t do much.  But I was bored and kind of lonesome, so it wasn’t exactly an enjoyable day.  I think I was lonesome because I didn’t feel good and I didn’t feel like getting out and doing anything.  I will have to make more effort in the future.  But I sure do need to get to feeling better.

Moving really did a number on my body.  I am still recovering.  I hurt all over.  My knees, in particular, are hurting pretty badly.  This, I know, is radiating pain from my back.  It has gotten worse.  I hope it is just a flare-up and as I rest, etc., it will improve.

I did pretty well on my eating during the time Stephanie was sick, and when she lost her job and we were preparing to move, and not too bad when we were actually moving (and burned enough calories to offset any extra I had eaten), but I have not done very well during the last week.  I kind of crashed and burned.  Now, it is time to pull myself back together.  I have not weighed, so don’t know what damage I have done.  I just know I don’t feel well and I don’t want to continue feeling this way.  I have already eaten something I wish I hadn’t this morning (just a granola bar, so nothing awful), but I need to stay on track and drink my water.  I haven’t been doing very well at that (and most of the water I have been drinking was sparkling mineral water, which does not seem to hydrate me as well).  Hopefully I can get my pain under better control, and that will help.

I still have a lot of things to put away, pictures to hang, etc., etc.  I was just too busy last week at work to have the energy to do much of it when I got home.  But I have made little bits of progress each day.

Now, I need to get back into an exercise routine.  The only thing I am doing now is walking Cassie two or three times a day.  I walked him around a big city block this morning, but my pain was too out of control to do much else this morning.

I still haven’t done any cooking to speak of.  I am thinking about doing Subway for this week, until I get more of a plan going.  I also need to buy some more groceries.  That is a dilemma in itself, since my son is borrowing my car right now.  It has to be that way if I want him getting to work, which I do.  He is trying to get his car fixed this week so I can have mine back.

Blogging today is part of trying to get going.  If I talk about it, it will start motivating me.  I hope by the end of the day to be feeling much better pain-wise.  I sincerely hope so.  I did not feel like coming to work today, but had to.  My backup has had too many long hours lately, and I couldn’t do that to her.  But I do not feel well enough to be here, truth be told.  Especially since I had very little sleep last night.  I will try to get to bed early tonight.

It occurs to me that walking Cassie is one of the things making my pain worse.  I don’t know.  I do know that I did not do walking as my exercise for a number of months because it seemed to trigger more pain.  That is why I used the recumbent bike.  The trouble is, since I now live alone and I am all Cassie has, plus the fact that I live in a high-rise condo and can’t just throw him out in the back yard, he needs to be walked or he gets too much pent-up energy and his behavior gets worse.  Plus, he whines and won’t leave me alone because he needs to get out of the house.  So I really have to walk him, unless I pay someone else to do it right now.  And I really don’t feel like I have money to spend on that right now.  I just hope my pain gets better in a few days.  I need to get done with any extra lifting, etc.  It is all a vicious circle.  All I know is, I feel pretty desperate for some pain relief right now.

That’s all for now.  Just trying to get going again.

I haven’t gotten my internet going at home, so I haven’t been able to read blogs lately.  I hope I can get that going tonight.  It is so motivating to me to read what others are doing, and I really cannot do much of that at work.

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