Okay, I am going to try to blog myself through a rough spot this afternoon. I am sitting at my desk, very sleepy, and wanting something to eat. I am having thoughts of going downstairs to get something I should not have, but I really want to make it through this. The tiredness is the trigger, and eating will do no good, really. Only a momentary comfort, and then I will be frustrated with myself.
I felt so much better yesterday because I was not mad at myself for eating out of control. That has really been the main thing causing me to be down. There are other stresses, but that was what was making me unhappy. So I do not want to continue that.
It is the medication making me sleepy, even though I only took a half dose this afternoon. I have done all I can do in every other way to alleviate the situation, so I am just going to have to grit my teeth and say no. I will not give in.
After walking Cassie around the block this morning, I did get a workout on the recumbent bike in the fitness center. I did not, however, get a walk midday. That is because I went and got my hair cut. It feels better. This is not a great picture, but what do you think? This is shorter than I have worn it in many, many years. (Shorter than I intended, but sometimes hairdressers have their own ideas. Oh well, it will grow, and I do like it.)
I am starting to get more things done at home. I am not ready to take pictures yet, but I am making more progress now. I am trying to focus on getting more done each day (partly to counter my destructive eating behavior). Between getting out and taking walks, the fitness center and working on that, it helps to keep me somewhat distracted. I was looking at the pool this morning. I need to do that sometime soon, too, before it gets too cold. (It may be too cold where you are already, but not in Texas.) I at least need to take advantage of the hot tub. At least the shorter hair will make it easier to deal with. And maybe I could get to know some people. Although I feel a little shy about the first time I meet people being in the pool with my swimsuit on. Oh well, I am sure most people will think little of it, and those that do are not the type of people I want to be friends with much anyway.
It is about 5:15 now, so less than an hour to go. I am going to make it. I will grab a quick snack when I get home and then go straight out to walk. I am sure Cassie will need to go outside (if it is not too late already; glad I have concrete floors). I will probably have leftovers for dinner. Then more work on the apartment and some TV.
I have four large bins of clothes in my closet that are too small for me. I told myself when we were moving that I would give myself until the first of the year and if I was not into a lot of them by then, I had to get rid of them. So I have to stay focused. I think I have a mental block of really believing I am going to get below 260. I need to get focused and keep going. I can do this. I would like to be down to 240 by the end of the year.