I've still been in a real funk. I am not sure what to attribute it to. I try to think of what is making me unhappy. Mostly what is bothering me is that my eating is out of control. So why don't I just change that? Well, that is the plan today. I went to the grocery store this weekend, so I have no excuse.
Being here alone in this apartment seems to be a trigger. I don't feel sad about that (being alone). I don't feel particularly lonely. I just feel like eating all the time.
I have been extremely tired, and that is a big trigger for me. I am talking I can't stay awake. I don't know if it is just a build-up of the last couple of months or not. My daughters and I went and got something to eat after shopping Saturday afternoon and my eyes were crossing while talking to them. They were laughing at me.
I am just trying to talk myself through this. Although I am not doing formal workouts, I am walking a lot. Most days, I am doing 3 walks a day. Cassie drives me crazy if I don't. First thing in the morning I get up and take a short walk with Cassie. It is tough then because pain first thing in the morning is the worst. I have tried to do what I can to help. I set my alarm 30 minutes before I am actually getting up and take my pain medicine. I started taking a bigger dose for that one and leaving off the the nighttime dose. That seems to help. This morning, I tried to do a little stretching before getting out of bed. My worst pain is when I go from periods of inactivity to being more active. I have to say this was the best result I have had yet. At least I wasn't gasping when I stood up in the morning.
Then, I take another walk mid-day -- usually 30-45 minutes. And then another when I get home from work. So, that is quite a bit of walking for me. I did do one recumbent bike workout last week. I didn't get one done this morning, but I will do one tomorrow morning. My main focus today is getting my eating back on track.
I wrote the above this morning and intended to post it then, but didn't get it done. I am happy to say, though, that I have had a pretty good day. And I feel better because I have been in better control.
I also figured out something. When I moved, I had to change pharmacies. I got my first refill of pain meds and took the first dose Saturday morning. They are the same, but a different brand. But I realized they make me feel a lot sleepier than the other ones. And spacey, in general. I am going to have to take a half dose of these, especially if I am working. Hopefully a half dose takes care of the pain. I don't like feeling that way. But that's why I was feeling so tired and sleepy this weekend.
Well anyway, today was a step in the right direction.